Overlawyered: Chronicling The High Cost Of Our Legal System

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Learning to accept coconuts

From a New York Times article on the city of Los Angeles’s decision to curtail the planting of palm trees along public streets and parks, one reason being that the majestic plants have been known to drop bulky fronds on persons below:

“Hawaii has a lot of coconut tree liability problems because they fall on people’s heads,” he said. “But the people there have said, ‘That is something that we have to accept.’”

(Jennifer Steinhauer, “City Says Its Urban Jungle Has Little Room for Palms”, Nov. 26). See also Jun. 11 (similar, from Torquay, England). More on coconut liability, in both cases relating to the decorated Mardi Gras variety: Mar. 4, 2005 (thrown at parade spectators); Mar. 13-14, 2002 (copyright claim).

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Matrimonial data mining

Contemplating a splitup? Grab the family hard drive and get it into your lawyer’s hands ASAP. Such a stratagem “can be best explained to the client as an important first glimpse into the overall actions and conduct of the adverse party in the litigation”. (Scott Andino, “Digging Deeply Into Matrimonial Data Mining”, The Matrimonial Strategist/Law.com, Nov. 10).

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Oz: but where are the clients’ bonuses?

Updating the Oct. 3 item from Australia: “Law firm Slater & Gordon was within its rights to pay a senior partner $1 million from the profits of a breast implant class action without informing clients, according to the Law Institute of Victoria. The bonus, which came to light this week, means senior partner Peter Gordon received at least eight times more from the class action than any one of the firm’s 3100 clients. Their payouts ranged from a few hundred dollars up to $120,000. However, law institute head Michael Brett Young said yesterday there had been no need to inform the women about the payment to Mr Gordon because the settlement in the action had been authorised by a judge.” (Chris Merritt and Tracy Ong, “Law firm ‘in rights’ on payout”, The Australian, Sept. 16). For allegations that the $1 million was improperly paid to Mr. Slater although earmarked as “post-settlement expenses”, see the Oct. 3 post.

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Hey, look, I’m suing Cisco Systems

Dr. Michael Hébert opens his mail to learn that the law firms of Lerach Coughlin and Levin Papantonio have been representing him in a class action for the past four years, in a shareholder suit against Cisco. One problem he notices is that the opt-out notice arrives in his mailbox two weeks after the expiration of the period allowed for opting out. And he finds other reasons as well not to be overly impressed by the generosity of Messrs. Lerach Coughlin and Levin Papantonio, even if they are willing to contribute their valuable legal services for a mere $15 million in fees plus expenses. (Doctor Hébert’s Medical Gumbo, Nov. 16).

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Update: cosmetics class action settlement

We’re tardy in noticing this, but it’s too colorful to omit: in the settlement of what we called the “no-blush, high-gloss, invisible-foundation antitrust class action” against cosmetics makers over pricing (see Jan. 14 and Mar. 14, 2005, and earlier links) the fee phase continued to generate showy highlights:

A bitter legal brawl over attorneys’ fees has erupted in a national cosmetics pricing class action lawsuit, with feuding camps of plaintiffs’ lawyers slinging allegations of flagrant billing abuses and extortion.

Among the alleged abuses were bills of $195 an hour for work by paralegals who were paid just $30, claims that attorneys and paralegals worked 24-hour or even 72-hour days, and charges of $90 an hour or more for cleaning desks and filing….

Read On…

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Welcome O’Reilly Radio Factor listeners

I was a guest just now on the radio O’Reilly Factor, guest-hosted by KABC’s Doug McIntyre, to discuss the L.A. firefighter dog food hazing suit. A couple more background links on the story, to go with those collected by Ted above: Christine Pelisek, “Dog food caper”, L.A. Weekly, Nov. 21 (“for nearly a week after the original story hit the papers — a tale of racist America making a black man eat dog food — the print media all but squelched the ensuing developments. The only hint of a brewing debacle was an almost invisible, 2-inch-long “brief” in the Los Angeles Times on November 15.”) and Eric Berlin, Nov. 21 (discussing several stories on this site, and disputing the notion that dog food somehow historically evokes slavery) and Nov. 22.

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Taser as cause of death

Lisa Kohler, the medical examiner of Summit County, Ohio, twice listed Taser stun-guns as a contributing factor in the deaths of area men who came out on the losing side in confrontations with police. So now the company that makes Tasers is suing her. (Phil Trexler, “Taser sues Summit medical examiner”, Akron Beacon Journal, Nov. 18). MedPundit is dubious about the suit’s merits (Nov. 18).

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Chuck E. Cheese gnat swarm

According to Kimberly Halpern’s lawsuit, her family was visiting a Staten Island branch of the kid’s pizza-and-games emporium when a terrifying cloud of flying insects emerged from a vent and repeatedly stung her son Austin, 4, sending him to an emergency room. Now he’s developed a psychological fear of the whole Chuck E. Cheese entertainment package. A spokeswoman for the restaurant “said that no one else was stung that day, and an exterminator’s visit showed ‘no evidence of a swarm of killer gnats.'” (Janon Fisher, “Suit Bites Chuck E. ‘Fleas'”, New York Post, Nov. 19).

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UK: 43-year legacy battle empties estate

“For the past 43 years the Weston family of Stoke-on-Trent have been in and out of court arguing over a legacy. They should have known better. What must be one of Britain’s longest running legal battles ended in the Court of Appeal yesterday with a judgment that means, in effect, that most of the £480,000 the clan were fighting over will disappear into the pockets of lawyers. …If the Weston family business was now to celebrate by producing a sign, it would read: ‘Don’t go to law unless you absolutely have to.’ And it would be in red neon, as a warning.” (Alan Hamilton, “Lawyers take the lot as family keeps £½m legacy feud going for 43 years”, Times Online, Oct. 26).

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