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May 2001 archives


May 10 — “Barbecue group sued over contest”. Jim Woodsmall of Jumpin’ Jim’s BBQ in Johnston, Ia., has sued the Kansas City Barbeque Society, charging that his business has suffered because the society has failed to award his barbecue recipe the stellar ratings he feels it deserved. The enthusiast group fails to follow impartial and uniform rules in its cook-offs, Woodsmall claims, which he thinks amounts to fraud and negligence. (Lindsey A. Henry, Des Moines Register, May 8).

May 10 — Fortune on Lemelson patents. We’ve run a couple of items on the amazing Jerome Lemelson patent operation (see Jan. 19, 2001 and August 28, 1999) and now Fortune weighs in with the best overview we’ve seen. Lemelson, who died in 1997, filed patents for hundreds of ideas and industrial processes which he said he had invented, and which underlay such familiar modern technologies as VCRs, fax machines, bar-code scanners, camcorders and automated warehouses. A mechanical genius? Well, at least a genius in figuring out the angles that could be worked with American patent law: by filing vague patents and then arranging to delay their issuance while amending their claims to adjust to later technological developments, Lemelson steered them into the path of unfolding technology, eventually securing bonanzas for his tireless litigation machine. Foreign-owned companies folded first because they were afraid of American juries, which helped give Lemelson the war chest needed to break the resistance of most of the big U.S.-based industries as well. $1.5 billion in royalties later, his estate continues to sue some 400 companies, with many more likely to be added in years to come. (Nicholas Varchaver, “The Patent King”, May 14).

May 10 — Prospect of $3 gas. One reason refinery disruptions lead to big spikes in the price of gasoline at the pump: environmental rules end up mandating a different blend of gas for each state, hampering efforts to ship supplies to where they’re most needed. (Ron Scherer, “50 reasons gasoline isn’t cheaper”, Christian Science Monitor, May 4; Ben Lieberman (Competitive Enterprise Institute), “Skyrocketing Ga$: What the Feds Can Do”, New York Post, April 23, reprinted at CEI site).

May 10 — Welcome Norwegian readers. We get discussed, and several of our recent news items summarized, on the “humor” section of Norway’s Spray Internet service (Bjørn Tore Øren, “For mange advokater”, May 8). Among other non-U.S. links which have brought us visitors: Australia’s legal-beat webzine, Justinian (“A journal with glamour — yet no friends”; more); Baker & Ballantyne, in the U.K.; the Virtual Law Library pages on media law compiled by Rosemary Pattenden at the University of East Anglia; and Sweden’s libertarian- leaning Contra.nu (“Har advokatkåren i USA för stort inflytande?” they ask of us)(more).

May 9 — Oklahoma forensics scandal. After serving fifteen years in prison on a 1986 rape conviction, Jeffrey Pierce was released Monday after new DNA evidence refuted testimony against him by a forensic specialist whose work is the subject of a growing furor. “From 1980 to 1993, Joyce Gilchrist was involved in roughly 3,000 cases as an Oklahoma City police laboratory scientist, often helping prosecutors win convictions by identifying suspects with hair, blood or carpet fibers taken from crime scenes.” Although peers, courts and professional organizations repeatedly questioned the competence and ethical integrity of her work, prosecutors asked few questions, perhaps because she was getting them a steady stream of positive IDs and jury verdicts in their favor. Now Oklahoma Gov. Frank Keating has ordered an investigation of felony cases on which Gilchrist worked after an FBI report “found she had misidentified evidence or given improper courtroom testimony in at least five of eight cases the agency reviewed.” (Jim Yardley, “Flaws in Chemist’s Findings Free Man at Center of Inquiry”, New York Times, May 8; “Inquiry Focuses on Scientist Used by Prosecutors”, May 2)(reg)

May 9 — Not about the money. Foreign policy making on a contingency fee: “When attorneys agreed to champion the causes of American victims of terrorism in the Middle East, it wasn’t supposed to be about the money.” We’ve heard that one before, haven’t we? “But the prospect of multimillion-dollar fees in what once seemed to be long-shot litigation against Iran has left lawyers fighting over fees in federal court in Washington, D.C. High principles of international law and justice aren’t at stake. It’s simply a matter of who gets paid.” (Jonathan Groner, “Anti-Terrorism Verdicts Spur Big Fee Fights”, Legal Times, April 18).

May 9 — Update: cookie lawsuit crumbles. Half-baked all along, and now dunked: a federal court in March dismissed a would-be class action lawsuit against web ad agency DoubleClick over its placing of “cookies” on web users’ hard drives. Other such suits remain pending (see also Feb. 2, 2000); this one was brought by Milberg Weiss’s Melvyn Weiss and by Bernstein, Litowitz (Michael A. Riccardi, “DoubleClick Can Keep Hand in Cookie Jar, Federal Judge Rules”, New York Law Journal, March 30).

May 8 — “Lawyers to Get $4.7 Million in Suit Against Iomega”. “Lawyers in a class action suit alleging defects in portable computer Zip disk drives will get the only cash payout, up to $4.7 million, in a proposed settlement with manufacturer Iomega Corp., according to the company’s Web site.” Rebates of between $5 and $40 will be offered to past customers who buy new Iomega products, while Milberg Weiss and three other law firms expect to split their fees in crisp greenbacks, not coupons, if a Delaware judge approves the settlement in June. (Yahoo/Reuters, April 12) (Rinaldi class action settlement notice, Iomega website).

May 8 — A definition (via Sony’s Morita and IBM’s Opel). “Litigious (li-TIJ-uhs) adjective: 1. Pertaining to litigation; 2. Eager to engage in lawsuits; 3. Inclined to disputes and arguments. [From Middle English, from Latin litigiosus from litigium, dispute.]

“‘My friend John Opel of IBM wrote an article a few years ago titled ‘Our Litigious Society,’ so I knew I was not alone in my view that lawyers and litigation have become severe handicaps to business, and sometimes worse.” — Sony co-founder Akio Morita (Wordsmith.org “A Word a Day” service, scroll to Jan. 26).

May 8 — “Halt cohabiting or no bail, judge tells defendants”. “A federal judge in Charlotte is using a 19th-century N.C. law banning fornication and adultery, telling defendants they won’t be freed on bond until they agree to get married, move out of the house or have their partner leave. U.S. Magistrate Judge Carl Horn won’t release a criminal defendant on bond knowing that he or she will break the law. And that includes North Carolina’s law against unmarried couples cohabiting, placed on the books in 1805.” (Eric Frazier and Gary L. Wright, Charlotte Observer, April 4) (see also May 18, 2000).

May 7 — Says cat attacked his dog; wants $1.5 million. “A San Marcos man has filed a $1.5 million claim against the city because a cat who lives in the Escondido Public Library allegedly attacked his dog.” Richard Espinosa says he was visiting the library on November 16 with his assistance dog Kimba, a 50-pound Labrador mix, when the feline, named L.C. or Library Cat because it’s allowed to live in the building, attacked the dog inflicting scratches and punctures. As for Espinosa, wouldn’t you know, he “was emotionally traumatized and suffers from flashbacks, terror, nightmares and other problems.” Four lawyers declined to take his case and he finally filed it himself. “The cat was apparently uninjured.” (Jonathan Heller, “Escondido gets $1.5 million claim; library cat allegedly assaulted dog”, San Diego Union-Tribune, May 4) (see letter to the editor from Espinosa, June 13).

May 7 — Judge throws out hog farm suit. As was reported a few months ago, a number of environmental groups aim to take a lesson from the tobacco affair by using mass lawsuit campaigns to pursue various goals which they haven’t been able to secure through the legislative and electoral process. To do this they’ve teamed up with tobacco-fee-engorged trial lawyers; the nascent alliance got lots of publicity in December with one of its first projects, suing Smithfield Farms for billions over the nuisance posed by large-scale hog farming, a project apparently masterminded by Florida trial lawyer Mike Papantonio (tobacco, asbestos, fen-phen) and with suits against chicken and livestock operations promised in later phases of the effort (see Dec. 7, 2000). Far less publicity has been accorded to Judge Donald W. Stephens’s ruling in March which threw out the first two lawsuits as having failed to state a legal claim against the large hog packer and raiser. (Appeal is expected.) Power scion Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. is still on board with his headline-ready name to front for the lawyers in the press, but he doesn’t seem to have gone out of his way to call attention to the adverse ruling (“North Carolina judge dismisses lawsuits against hog producer”, AP/MSNBC, March 30; Scott Kilman, “Environmental groups target factory-style hog farm facilities”, Wall Street Journal/MSNBC, undated; Smithfield press release, March 29).

MORE: National Public Radio, “Living on Earth” with Steve Curwood and reporter Leda Hartman, week of Feb. 16; Water Keeper Alliance (Kennedy’s group), hog campaign homepage with list of lawyers (J. Michael Papantonio, Steven Echsner and Neil Overholtz, Levin, Papantonio, Pensacola, Fla.; Thomas Sobol, Jan Schlichtmann, Steven Fineman and Erik Shawn of Lieff, Cabraser, New York and Boston; F. Kenneth Bailey, Jr. and Herbert Schwartz of Williams Bailey, Houston; Howard F. Twiggs and Douglas B. Abrams of Twiggs, Abrams, (Raleigh, N.C.), Ken Suggs and Richard H. Middleton, Jr. of Suggs, Kelly & Middleton (Columbia, S.C.), Joe Whatley, Jr., Birmingham, Ala.; Kevin Madonna, Chatham, N.Y.; Stephen Weiss and Chris Seeger, New York; Charles Speer, Overland Park, Kan.; Hiram Eastland, Greenwood, Miss.) Compare “Conoco Could Face $500 Million Lawsuit Over Bayou Water Pollution Problems”, Solid Waste Digest: Southern Edition, March 2001 (page now removed, but GoogleCached) (Papantonio campaign in Pensacola).

May 7 — Website accessibility law hits the U.K. “Scottish companies were warned yesterday that they could face prosecution if their websites are not accessible to the disabled. Poorly-designed websites are often incompatible with Braille software.” (more) (yet more) (Pauline McInnes, “Firms warned on websites access”, The Scotsman, April 19).

May 4-6 — By reader acclaim: “Vegetarian sues McDonald’s over meaty fries”. Seattle attorney Harish Bharti wants hundreds of millions of dollars from the burger chain for its acknowledged policy of adding small amounts of beef flavoring to its french fries, which he says is deceptive toward vegetarian customers (ABCNews.com/ Reuters, May 3). Notable detail that hasn’t made it into American accounts of the case we’ve seen, but does appear in the Times of India: “When he is not practising law in Seattle, Bharti says he teaches at Gerry Spence’s exclusive College for Trial Lawyers in Wyoming”. Does this mean you can be a predator without being a carnivore? (“US Hindus take on McDonald’s over French fries”, Times of India, May 3) (see also Aug. 30, 1999).

May 4-6 — Mississippi’s forum-shopping capital. The little town of Fayette, Miss., reports the National Law Journal, is “ground zero for the largest legal attack on the pharmaceutical industry” in memory. Tens of thousands of plaintiffs are suing in the Fayette courthouse over claimed side effects from such drugs as fen-phen, Rezulin, and Propulsid, not because they’re local residents (most aren’t) but because the state’s unusually lax courtroom rules allow lawyers to bring them in from elsewhere to profit from the town’s unique brand of justice. The townspeople, nearly half of whom are below the poverty level and only half of whom graduated from high school, “have shown that they are willing to render huge compensatory and punitive damages awards”. Among other big-dollar outcomes, Houston plaintiff’s lawyer Mike Gallagher of Gallagher, Lewis, Serfin, Downey & Kim “helped win a $150 million compensatory damages verdict for five fen-phen plaintiffs in Jefferson County on Dec. 21, 1999. The jury deliberated for about two hours…” There’s just one judge in Fayette County to hear civil cases, Judge Lamar Pickard, whose handling of trials is bitterly complained of by out-of-town defendants. As for appeal, that route became less promising for defendants last November when plaintiff’s lawyers solidified their hold on the Mississippi Supreme Court by knocking off moderate incumbent Chief Justice Lenore Prather.

Lots of good details here, including how the Bankston Drug Store, on Main Street in Fayette since 1902, has the bad fortune to get named in nearly every suit because that tactic allows the lawyers to keep the case from being removed to federal court. Plaintiff’s lawyer Gallagher, who also played a prominent role in the breast implant affair, says criticism of the county’s jurors as easily played on by lawyers “‘sounds racist’, since the jury pool is predominantly black”. He also brushes off defendants’ complaints about forum-shopping with all the wit and sensibility at his command: “They want to tell me where I can sue them for the damage they caused? They can kiss my a**.” (Mark Ballard, “Mississippi becomes a mecca for tort suits”, National Law Journal, April 30).

May 4-6 — Agenda item for Ashcroft. Attorney General Ashcroft could make a real difference for beleaguered upstate New York communities by backing off the Justice Department’s Reno-era policy of avid support for revival of centuries-dormant Indian land claims, which went so far as to include the brutalist tactic of naming as defendants individual landowners whose family titles had lain undisturbed since the early days of the Republic (see Oct. 27, 1999, Feb. 1, 2000) (John Woods, “Long-Running Indian Land Claims in New York May Hinge on Ashcroft’s Stance”, New York Law Journal, April 16).

May 3 — “Family of shooting victim sue owners of Jewish day-care center”. If the gunman doesn’t succeed in wiping out your institution, maybe the lawyers will: “The parents of a boy who was shot by a white supremacist at a Jewish day-care center have filed a lawsuit claiming the center’s owners failed to provide the necessary security to prevent hate crime attacks.” Buford O. Furrow fired more than 70 shots at the North Valley Jewish Community Center in Los Angeles on Aug. 10, 1999 (AP/CNN, May 1).

May 3 — Update: mills of legal discipline. They grind slow, that’s for sure, but does that mean they grind exceeding fine? A disciplinary panel has ended its investigation of New Hampshire chief justice David Brock, letting him off with an admonishment, in the protracted controversy over the conduct (see April 5 and Oct. 11, 2000) which also led to his impeachment and acquittal in the state senate; Brock’s lawyer had threatened to sue the disciplinary panel if it continued its probe, and a dissenting committee member called that lawsuit-threat “intended to intimidate” (“Threat of lawsuit ended Brock case”, Nashua Telegraph, April 23; Dan Tuohy, “Finding bolsters call for reform”, Foster’s Daily Democrat, April 26). A hearing committee of the District of Columbia Board on Professional Responsibility has recommended that Mark Hager be suspended for three years over the episode [see Feb. 23, 2000] in which he and attorney John Traficonte “began negotiations with [drugmaker] Warner-Lambert to make refunds to consumers, and to pay himself and Hager $225,000 in exchange for which they would abandon their representation, agree to hold the agreement and fee secret from the public and their clients, and promise not to sue Warner-Lambert in the future. Traficonte and Hager accepted the offer without first obtaining the approval of any class member.” The disciplinary committee “found that Hager’s conduct was shockingly outrageous, and that his status as a law professor was a factor in aggravation.” We’ve seen no indication that anyone in the administration of American University’s law school, where Hager continues to teach, has expressed the smallest misgivings about the example that students are supposed to take from his conduct (Denise Ryan, law.com D.C., Board on Professional Responsibility No. 31-98, In re Hager, issued Nov. 30, 2000). (Update Jul. 19, 2003: Hager resigns AU post in April 2003). And off-the-wall Michigan tort lawyer and politician Geoffrey Fieger faces charges before the state attorney grievance commission following reports that he used his radio show to unleash “an obscenity-laced tirade” against three state appeals judges (“Fieger Under Fire For Alleged Swearing Fit”, MSNBC, April 17).

May 3 — “Valley doctors caught in ‘lawsuit war zone'”. A report from the Texas Board of Medical Examiners finds medical malpractice cases approximately tripled in 1999 in Texas’s McAllen-Brownsville region compared with the previous year. Among short-cuts lawyers are accused of employing: suing doctors without an authorization from the client, and hiring as their medical expert a family doctor who charges $500 an hour and has reviewed 700 cases for lawyers, second-guessing the work of such specialists as cardiovascular surgeons, but has not herself (according to an opposing lawyer) had hospital privileges since 1997. (James Pinkerton, Houston Chronicle, March 2 — via Houston CALA). State representative Juan Hinojosa has introduced a bill that would allow doctors and hospitals to countersue lawyers and clients who file suits with reckless disregard as to whether reasonable grounds exist for their action. (“Doctors seek new remedy to fight frivolous lawsuits”, CALA Houston, undated).

May 2 — Suing the coach. “A teenager, who felt she was destined for greatness as a softball player, has filed a $700,000 lawsuit against her former coach, alleging his ‘incorrect’ teaching style ruined her chances for an athletic scholarship. Cheryl Reeves, 19, of Rambler Lane in Levittown, also alleges that her personal pitching coach, Roy Jenderko, of Warminster, not only taught her an illegal style of pitching but also used ‘favorite players’ which resulted in demoralizing the teen. ” (Dave Sommers, “Legal Pitch”, The Trentonian, May 1).

May 2 — Trustbusters sans frontieres. Truly awful idea that surfaced in the press a while back: a bipartisan group of senators led by Sen. Arlen Specter (R-Pa.) say they’re trying to pressure the Bush administration to file an antitrust suit against the Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries, accusing it of restricting the output of oil in order to raise prices to consumers in countries like ours — which is, of course, OPEC’s reason for existence. “Most antitrust and foreign policy experts interviewed say they cannot imagine a scenario in which such legal action would succeed, or that any president would risk his foreign policy goals for such a lawsuit”, reports the National Law Journal. But even the gesture of inviting unelected judges and unpredictable juries to punish sovereign foreign powers would increase the chances of our landing in a series of confrontations and international incidents that would be at best imperfectly manageable by the nation’s executive branch and diplomatic corps (which cannot, for example, necessarily offer to reverse or suspend court decisions as a bargaining chip).

The United States’s relations with OPEC countries, it will be recalled, have on occasion embroiled us in actual shooting wars, which are bad enough when entered after deliberation on the initiative of those to whom such decisions are entrusted in our system of separation of powers, and would be all the less supportable if brought on us by the doings of some rambunctious judge or indignant jury. Wouldn’t it be simpler for Sen. Specter to just introduce a bill providing that the courts of the United States get to run the world from now on? (Matthew Morrissey, “Senators to Press for Suing OPEC Over Pricing”, National Law Journal, March 1).

May 1 — Columnist-fest. Scourings from our bookmark file:

* Mark Steyn on the Indian residential-school lawsuits that may soon bankrupt leading Canadian churches (see Aug. 23, 2000): (“I’ll give you ‘cultural genocide'”, National Post, April 9). Bonus: Steyn on protectionism, globalization and Quebec City (“Don’t fence me in”, April 19).

* Federalists under fire: there’s a press campaign under way to demonize the Federalist Society, the national organization for libertarian and conservative lawyers and law students. The Society has done a whole lot to advance national understanding of litigation abuses and overuse of the courts — could that be one reason it’s made so many powerful enemies? (Thomas Bray, “Life in the Vast Lane”, OpinionJournal.com, April 17; Marci Hamilton, “Opening Up the Law Schools: Why The Federalist Society Is Invaluable To Robust Debate”, FindLaw Writ, April 25; William Murchison, “In Defense of the Federalist Society”, Dallas Morning News, April 25).

* A Bush misstep: the White House has named drug-war advocate and Weekly Standard contributor John P. Walters as head of the Office of National Drug Control Policy. “Walters, almost alone among those who have spent serious professional time on drug abuse in America, harbors no misgivings over the fact that we’ve been crowding our prisons almost to the bursting point with nonviolent drug offenders.” (William Raspberry, “A Draco of Drugs”, Washington Post, April 30) (Lindesmith Center).

* “Overreaching IP legal teams kick the firm they supposedly represent”: Seth Shulman of Technology Review on the “patented peanut butter sandwich” case (see Jan. 30). (“Owning the Future: PB&J Patent Punch-up”, May). Also: California judge William W. Bedsworth (“Food Fight!”, The Recorder, March 16).


May 18-20 — “Couple sues for doggie damages”. Claiming that their 4-year-old golden retriever Boomer was hurt by an “invisible fence” electronic collar device, Andrew and Alyce Pacher, of Vandalia, Ohio, want to name the dog itself as a plaintiff in the suit. “It’s my opinion that it’s clear dogs cannot sue under Ohio law,” says the fence company’s lawyer. But the Pachers’ attorney, Paul Leonard, a former lieutenant governor and ex-mayor of Dayton, says that’s exactly what he hopes to change: he’s “hoping to upgrade the legal status of dogs in Ohio.” (“Damages for Injuries Caused by Invisible Fence Sought for Dog”, AP/FoxNews.com, May 11).

May 18-20 — “Fortune Magazine Ranks ATLA 5th Most Powerful Lobby”. The business magazine finds that plaintiff’s lawyers have more clout in Washington than the U.S. Chamber of Commerce or the AFL-CIO; more than Hollywood or the doctors or the realtors or the teachers or the bankers. (Fortune, May 28; ATLA jubilates over its rise from 6th to 5th, May 15).

May 18-20 — Batch of reader letters. Our biggest sack of correspondence yet includes a note from a reader wondering if some open-minded attorney would like to help draft a loser-pays initiative for the ballot in Washington state; more about carbonless paper allergies, the effects of swallowing 9mm bullets, the Granicy trial in California, and “consumer columns” that promote lawyers’ services; a link between ergonomics and gun control controversies; and a reader’s dissent on the case of the boy ticketed for jaywalking after being hit by a truck.

May 17 — “Crash lawyers like Boeing move”. Attorneys who sue after midair mishaps are pleased that Boeing is planning to relocate its headquarters to Chicago. They say the courts of Cook County, Ill., hand out much higher verdicts than those of Seattle, the aircraft maker’s former hometown. Some lawyers in fact predict that domestic crashes, at least when the plane is Boeing-made, are apt to be sued in Cook County from now on regardless of where the flight originated or went down; under the liberal rules of forum-shopping that prevail in American courts, most big airlines may be susceptible to venue in the Windy City since they do at least some business there. (Blake Morrison, “Crash lawyers like Boeing move”, USA Today, May 16).

May 17 — Like a hole in the head. As if the nine private law schools in the state of Massachusetts weren’t enough, proponents now want to establish a public one by having the state take over the struggling Southern New England School of Law at North Dartmouth, near New Bedford. (Denise Magnell, “Crash Course”, Boston Law Tribune, May 1).

May 17 — Lessons of shrub-case jailing. The months-long contempt-of-court jailing of John Thoburn of Fairfax County, Va. for refusing to erect enough trees and shrubs around his golf driving range is a good example of the excesses of bureaucratic legalism, says Washington Post columnist Marc Fisher (“In Fairfax shrub fight, Both Sides Dig In Stubbornly”, April 26). Some of the county’s elected supervisors voice few misgivings about the widely publicized showdown, saying their constituents want them to be tougher in cracking down on zoning violations. (Peter Whoriskey and Michael D. Shear, “Fairfax Zoning Case Draws World Attention”, Washington Post, April 21) (freejohnthoburn.com).

May 16 — No baloney. “A suspected drug dealer who was served a bullet-and-bologna sandwich wants a side of lettuce — about $5 million worth. ” Louis Olivo says he was given an officially prepared lunch during a break in a Brooklyn Supreme Court hearing last week, and felt something “crunchy” which turned out to be a bullet. Surgery (not syrup of ipecac?) is expected to remove the 9mm bullet from Olivo’s stomach; his lawyer wants $5 million (Christopher Francescani, “$5M Lawsuit Over Bulletin in Bologna”, New York Post, May 15) (& letter to the editor, May 18)

May 16 — “Who’s afraid of principled judges?” More questions should be raised about a retreat held at Farmington, Pa. earlier this month in which 42 Democratic Senators were lectured on the need to apply ideological litmus tests to judicial nominees, writes Denver Post columnist Al Knight. (May 13). “Liberals rightly decried efforts a decade ago to turn membership in the American Civil Liberties Union into a disqualification for high office; current efforts to do the same thing to the Federalist Society are equally wrong. … In fact, they are the only group, liberal or conservative, that regularly sponsors debates throughout the nation’s law schools on important public-policy issues.” (Howard Shelansky, “Who’s Afraid of the Federalist Society?”, Wall Street Journal, May 15).

May 16 — Drawing pictures of weapons. In Oldsmar, Fla., an eleven-year-old “was taken from his elementary school in handcuffs after his classmates turned him in for drawing pictures of weapons.” (Ed Quioco and Julie Church, “Student removed from class because of drawings”, St. Petersburg Times, May 11; “Pinellas fifth grader cuffed, sent home after classmates turn him in for drawing weapons”, AP/Fort Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel, May 11). In Sunderland, England, police raided Roland Hopper’s 11th birthday party and arrested him as he cut the cake after he was seen playing with the new pellet gun his mother had bought him (“Armed Police Raid 11th Birthday”, Newcastle Journal, April 10). And the website ztnightmares.com, which developed out of a controversy at Lewis-Palmer High School in Monument, Colo., “publicizes the downside or evils of zero tolerance school discipline policies” and has a noteworthy list of outside links as well as horror stories.

May 15 — “Judges or priests?”. Why have judicial nomination fights taken on the intensity and bitterness once associated with religious disputes? “The only places left in this country that could be described as temples — for that is how we treat them — are the courts. … They are temples because the judges who sit in them now constitute a priesthood, an oracular class … we have abdicated to them our personal responsibility and, in many cases, even what used to be the smallest judgment call a citizen had to make for himself.” (Tunku Varadarajan, WSJ OpinionJournal.com, May 11).

May 15 — Techies fear Calif. anti-confidentiality bill. Trial lawyers have been pushing hard for the enactment of legislation granting them wide leeway to disseminate to anyone they please much of the confidential business information they dig up by compulsory process in lawsuits. (At present, judges are free to issue “protective orders” which restrain such dissemination.) Proponents say lawyers will use this new power to publicize serious safety hazards that now remain unaired; critics predict they will use it to stir up more lawsuits and for general leverage against defendants who have been found guilty of no wrong but who don’t want the inner details of their business to fall into the hands of competitors or others. A lawyer-backed bill had been hurtling toward enactment in California following the Firestone debacle, but now a counterforce has emerged in the person of high-tech execs who say the proposal “could expose confidential company information, stifle innovation and encourage frivolous litigation. … TechNet CEO Rick White called the bills ‘the most significant threat to California’s technology companies since Prop. 211.’ White was referring to the 1996 initiative that would have made company directors and high-ranking executives personally vulnerable to shareholder lawsuits.” (Scott Harris, “Old Foes Squabble Over Secrecy Bills”, Industry Standard/Law.com, May 10).

May 15 — Canadian court: divorce settlements never final. The Ontario Court of Appeal has ruled that courts may revisit and overturn former divorce settlements if a “material change of circumstances” has taken place since the original deal. “Tens of thousands of people who believed they had agreed to a ‘final’ divorce settlement could face more financial demands … Family law lawyers predict a surge of legal attacks on separation agreements and marriage contracts as a result of the ruling.” (Cristin Schmitz, “Divorce deals never final: court”, Southam News/National Post, April 28).

May 14 — Write a very clear will. Or else your estate could wind up being fought over endlessly in court like that of musician Jerry Garcia (Kevin Livingston, “Garcia Estate Fight Keeps On Truckin'”, The Recorder, April 25; Steve Silverman, “Online Fans Sing Blues About Garcia Estate Wrangling”, Wired News, Dec. 16, 1996; Don Knapp, “Garcia vs. Garcia in battle for Grateful wealth”, CNN, Dec. 14, 1996). Or actor James Mason (A Star is Born, North by Northwest) (“He would have been horrified by all this. … he hated litigation”) (Caroline Davies, “James Mason’s ashes finally laid to rest”, Daily Telegraph (London), Nov. 25, 2000). Or timber heir H.J. Lutcher Stark of Orange, Texas, who died in 1965 and whose estate, with that of his wives, has spawned several rounds of litigation which look as far back for their subject matter as 1939 and are still in progress (William P. Barrett, “How Lawyers Get Rich”, Forbes, April 2 (reg)).

May 14 — City gun suits: “extortion parading as law”. To curb the use of officially sponsored litigation as a regulatory bludgeon, as in the gun suits, the Cato Institute’s Robert Levy recommends “a ‘government pays’ rule for legal fees when a governmental unit is the losing plaintiff in a civil case”. (Robert A. Levy, “Pistol Whipped: Baseless Lawsuits, Foolish Laws”, Cato Policy Analysis #400 (executive summary links to full paper — PDF))

May 14 — Update: “Messiah” prisoner’s lawsuit dismissed. In a 22-page opinion, federal district judge David M. Lawson has dismissed the lawsuit filed by a Michigan prisoner claiming recognition as the Messiah (see April 30). The opinion contains much to reward the curious reader, such as the list on page 5 of the inmate’s demands (including “5 million breeding pairs of bison” and “25,000 mature breeding pairs of every creature that exists in the State of Michigan,” and the passage on page 18 citing as precedent for dismissal similar previous cases such as Grier v. Reagan (E.D. Pa. Apr. 1, 1986), “finding that plaintiff’s claim she was God of the Universe fantastic and delusional and dismissing as frivolous complaint which sought items ranging from a size sixteen mink coat and diamond jewelry to a three bedroom home in the suburbs and a catered party at the Spectrum in Philadelphia”). (opinion dated April 26 (PDF), Michigan Bar Association site) (DURABLE LINK)

May 11-13 — Welcome Aardvark Daily readers (NZ). “New Zealand’s leading source of Net-Industry news and commentary since 1995” just referred us a whole bunch of antipodal visitors by featuring this website in its “Lighten Up” section. It says we offer “an aggregation of quirky and oddball legal actions which go to prove that the USA has far too many lawyers for its own good”. (Aardvark.co.nz). For NZ-related items on this site, check out July 26, Sept. 8 and Oct. 31, 2000, as well as “Look for the Kiwi Label”, Reason, July 2000, by our editor.

May 11-13 — New York tobacco fees. “An arbitration panel has awarded $625 million in attorneys’ fees to the six firms that were hired by New York state to sue the tobacco industry, say sources close to the arbitration report.” The well-connected city law firm of Schneider, Kleinick, Weitz, Damashek & Shoot (which last year was reported to be renting office space to New York Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver; see May 1, 2000) will receive $98.4 million. Three firms that took a major national role in the tobacco heist will share $343.8 million from the New York booty, to add to their rich haul from other states; they are Ness Motley, Richard Scruggs’ Mississippi firm, and Seattle’s Hagens & Berman. (Daniel Wise, “Six Firms Split $625 Million in Fees for New York’s Share of Big Tobacco Case,” New York Law Journal, April 24). Update Jun. 21-23, 2002: judge to review ethical questions raised by fee award.

May 11-13 — “Judges behaving badly”. The National Law Journal‘s fourth annual roundup of judicial injudiciousness includes vignettes of jurists pursuing personal vendettas, earning outside income in highly irregular ways, jailing people without findings of guilt, and getting in all sorts of trouble on matters of sex. Then there’s twice-elected Judge Ellis Willard of Sharkey County, Mississippi, who allegedly “fabricated evidence such as docket pages, arrest warrants, faxes [and] officers’ releases.” That was why he got in trouble, not just because he was fond of holding court in his Beaudron Pawn Shop and Tire Center, “a tire warehouse flanked by service bays on one side and a store that holds the judge’s collection of Coca-Cola memorabilia.” (Gail Diane Cox, National Law Journal, April 30).

May 11-13 — Update: Compaq beats glitch suit. In 1999, after Toshiba ponied up more than a billion dollars to settle a class action charging that its laptops had a glitch in their floppy drives, lawyers filed follow-on claims against other laptop makers whose machines they said displayed the same problem. But Compaq refused to settle, and now Beaumont, Tex. federal judge Thad Heartfield has felt constrained to dismiss the suit against it on the grounds that plaintiff’s lawyer Wayne Reaud had failed to show that any user suffered the requisite $5,000 in damages. (Daniel Fisher, “Billion-Dollar Bluff”, Forbes, April 16 (now requires registration)).


May 31 — Fieger’s firecrackers frequently fizzle. Famed lawyer Geoffrey Fieger extracts huge damage awards from Michigan juries in civil cases even more often than he manages to get Dr. Jack Kevorkian off the hook from criminal charges, but he does much less well when the big awards reach higher levels of judicial consideration. “In the last two years, Fieger and his clients have watched as judges, acting on appeal or post-trial motion, erased more than $55 million in jury verdicts,” including $15 million and $13 million verdicts against Detroit-area hospitals and a $30 million verdict, reduced by the judge to $3 million, arising from a Flint highway accident. Opponents say Fieger’s courtroom vilification of opponents and badgering of witnesses often impresses jurors but plays less well in the calmer written medium of an appellate record.

Appeals courts are now considering Fieger cases “totaling an estimated $50 million to $100 million … Among those cases is $25 million awarded in the infamous Jenny Jones talk-show case and $20 million to a woman who was sexually harassed at a Chrysler plant.” (Update Oct. 25-27, 2002: appeals court throws out Jenny Jones verdict. Further update Jul. 24, 2004: state high court throws out Chrysler verdict). Fieger, who was the unsuccessful Democratic challenger to Michigan Gov. John Engler at the last election, charges that the appeals courts are politically biased against him: “It’s a conspiracy to get me”. However, a reporter’s examination of Fieger cases that went up to appeals courts indicates that the partisan or philosophic background of the judges on the panels doesn’t seem to make a marked difference in his likelihood of success (Dawson Bell, “Fieger’s wins lose luster in appeals”, Detroit Free Press, May 29). “Colorful” barely begins to describe Fieger’s past run-ins with the law and with disciplinary authorities; see Dawson Bell, “Fieger’s skeletons won’t stay buried”, Detroit Free Press, August 13, 1998.

May 31 — “Dead teen’s family sues Take our Kids to Work”. Had to happen eventually dept.: in Welland, Ontario, “[t]he family of a teenage girl killed while driving a utility vehicle at a John Deere plant is suing the company, the school board and the organizers of Take Our Kids to Work day.” (Karena Walter, National Post, May 25).

May 31 — Pale Nanny with an ad budget. The Indoor Tanning Association, a salon trade group, is “worried about proposed legislation in Texas that would outlaw indoor tanning for anyone under age 18, require tanning salons to post pictures of different types of skin cancer, and allow dermatologists and anti-tanning activists to make contributions to the Texas Health Department to pay for an anti-tanning advertising campaign.” You didn’t think these sorts of campaigns were going to stop with tobacco, did you? (“Inside Washington — Presenting: This Season’s Latest Tan Lines”, April 14, National Journal, subscribers only).

May 30 — Supreme Court: sure, let judges redefine golf. By a 7-2 vote, the high court rules that the PGA can be forced to change its rules so as to let disabled golfer Casey Martin ride in a cart between holes while other contestants walk. (Yahoo Full Coverage; Christian Science Monitor; PGA Tour v. Martin decision in PDF format — Scalia dissent, which is as usual the good part, begins about two-thirds of the way down). For our take, see Reason, May 1998; disabled-rights sports cases).

May 30 — Microsoft v. Goliath. “The antitrust laws originally aimed to preserve competition as idealized by Adam Smith. Can they now preserve and promote Schumpeter’s [“creative destruction”] competition? The Microsoft case suggests that they cannot. ” (Robert Samuelson, “The Gates of Power”, The New Republic, Apr. 23).

May 30 — Evils of contingent-fee tax collection, cont’d. Another city, this time Meriden, Ct., has gotten in trouble for hiring a private firm to assist in its taxation process on a contingent-fee basis — in this case, the firm conducted property reassessments and got to keep a share of the new tax revenue hauled in by them. A Connecticut judge has now found that this system gave the firm a pointed incentive to inflate supposed property values unjustifiably, that it had done so in the case at hand, and that the incentive scheme, by destroying the impartiality that we expect of public servants, had deprived taxpayers of their rights to due process under both federal and state constitutions. He ordered the city to refund $15.6 million to two utility companies whose holdings had been overassessed in this manner. (Thomas Scheffey, “Connecticut Judge Blasts City’s $15.6 Million Mistake”, Connecticut Law Tribune, May 3). It’s yet another recognition (see Jan. 10, 2001; Dec. 3, 1999) that when governments hire contingent-fee professionals to advise them on whether private parties owe them money and if so how much, due process flies out the window — as has happened routinely in the new tobacco/gun/lead paint class of lawsuits, which operate on precisely this model.

May 29 — Claim: inappropriate object in toothpaste caused heart attack. A Shelton, Ct. man is suing Colgate-Palmolive, claiming he discovered an extremely indelicate object in a six-ounce standup tube of the company’s regular toothpaste and that the resulting stress caused his blood pressure to escalate over a matter of months, leading him to suffer a heart attack a year later. The company said it does not think its production processes would have allowed the offending object to have entered the tube. (“Man sues over condom in toothpaste”, AP/WTNH New Haven, May 25).

May 29 — States lag in curbing junk science. According to one estimate, only about half of state courts presently follow the U.S. Supreme Court’s standard for excluding unreliable scientific evidence from trials (Daubert v. Merrell Dow, 1993). Where states follow a laxer standard, they run the risk of approving verdicts based on strawberry-jam-causes-cancer “junk science”. A new group called the Daubert Council, headed by Charles D. Weller and David B. Graham of Cleveland’s Baker & Hostetler, aims to fix that situation by persuading the laggard states to step up to the federal standard. (Darryl Van Duch, “Group is Pushing ‘Daubert'”, National Law Journal, May 25).

May 29 — Brace for data-disaster suits. Companies with a substantial information technology presence are likely to become the targets of major liability lawsuits in areas such as hacker attacks, computer virus spread, confidentiality breach, and business losses to co-venturers and customers, according to various experts in the field. (Jaikumar Vijayan, “IT security destined for the courtroom”, ComputerWorld, May 21).

May 28 — Holiday special: dispatches from abroad. Today is Memorial Day in the U.S., which we will observe by skipping American news just for today in favor of the news reports that continue to pour in from elsewhere:

* Swan victim Mary Ryan, 71, has lost her $32,600 negligence claim against authorities over an incident in which one of the birds knocked her to the ground in Phoenix Park in central Dublin, Ireland. She testified that she had just fed the swan and was walking away when she heard a great flapping of wings and was knocked down, suffering a broken wrist. “Ryan said park commissioners should have put up signs warning the public about ‘the mischievous propensity and uncertain temperament'” of the birds, but Judge Kevin Haugh ruled that evidence had not established that the park’s swans were menacing in general, although the one in question had concededly been having “a very bad day.” (Reuters/Excite, May 25).

* In Canada, the New Brunswick Court of Appeal has ruled improper the disbarment of Fredericton attorney Michael A.A. Ryan, whom the Law Society had removed from practice after finding that he had lied to clients and falsified work, reports the National Post. To conceal his neglect of cases which had lapsed due to statutes of limitations, “Mr. Ryan gave his clients reports of hearings, motions and discoveries that never occurred, and when pressed for details of a supposedly favourable judgment, forged a decision from the Court of Appeal. The clients were eventually told they had won $20,000 each in damages,” but in the end Ryan had to confess that he had been making it all up. “The lawyer has admitted to a long-standing addiction to drugs and alcohol, and told the court he was depressed during the period of his misconduct because of the breakup of his marriage.” (Jonathon Gatehouse, “Court gives lawyer who lied to clients second chance,” National Post, May 18).

* Authorities in Northumbria, England, have agreed to pay thousands of pounds to Detective Inspector Brian Baker, who blames his nocturnal snoring on excessive inhalation of cannabis (marijuana) dust in the line of police duty. Baker says that his spending four days in a storeroom with the seized plants resulted in nasal congestion, sniffing, dry throat, and impaired sense of smell as well as a snore that led to “marital disharmony”. (Ian Burrell, “Payout for policeman who blamed his snoring on cannabis”, The Independent (U.K.), April 11; Joanna Hale, “Drugs inquiry made detective a snorer”, The Times (U.K.), April 11). And updating an earlier story (see May 22), a woman in Bolton, Lancashire has prevailed in her suit against a stage hypnotist whose presentation caused her to regress to a childlike state and recall memories of abuse; damages were $9,000 (AP/ABC News, May 25).

May 25-27 — “Judge buys shopaholic defense in embezzling”. “A Chicago woman who stole nearly $250,000 from her employer to finance a shopping addiction was spared from prison in a novel ruling Wednesday by a federal judge who found that she bought expensive clothing and jewelry to ‘self-medicate’ her depression.” Elizabeth Roach faced a possible 18-month prison term for the embezzlement under federal sentencing guidelines, but U.S. District Judge Matthew Kennelly reduced her sentence, sparing her the big house, in what was evidently “the first time in the country that a federal judge reduced a defendant’s sentence because of an addiction to shopping.” She had bought a $7,000 belt buckle and run credit-card bills up to $500,000. (Matt O’Connor, Chicago Tribune, May 24).

May 25-27 — Columnist-fest. More reasons to go on reading newspapers:

* A New York legislator has introduced a joint custody bill that he thinks would significantly reduce the state’s volume of child custody litigation, but it hasn’t gone anywhere. Leaving aside debates about the other pros and cons of joint custody, one reason it languishes is that it “has been opposed by matrimonial lawyers in the state. ‘They make their living on these divorces,’ said [assemblyman David] Sidikman, a lawyer himself. “… The parents usually start off these cases promising to be adults, but that doesn’t last once the lawyers get involved.” “(John Tierney, “The Big City: A System for Lawyers, Not Children”, New York Times, May 15 (reg)). Bonus: Tierney on the NIMBY-ists who would sue to keep IKEA from building a store in a blighted Brooklyn neighborhood (“Stray Dogs As a Litigant’s Best Friend”, April 13).

* Steve Chapman points out that the recent release of an Oklahoma man long imprisoned for a rape he didn’t commit (see May 9) casts doubt not only on shoddy forensics but also on that convincing-seeming kind of evidence, eyewitness testimony (“Don’t believe what they say they see”, Chicago Tribune, May 13). Bonus: Chapman on the scandal of medical-pot prohibition (“Sickening policy on medical marijuana”, May 17).

* Reparations: “Germans may be paying for the sins of their fathers but asking Americans to stump up for what great-great-great-grandpappy did seems to be rather stretching a point. ” (Graham Stewart, “Why we simply can’t pay compensation for every stain on our history”, The Times (U.K.), March 22).

May 25-27 — “Gone with the Wind” parody case. The legal status of parody as a defense to copyright infringement is still uncertain in many ways, and contrary to a widespread impression there is no legal doctrine allowing extra latitude in copying material from works such as the Margaret Mitchell novel that have become “cultural icons” (Kim Campbell, “Who’s right?”, Christian Science Monitor, May 24; Ken Paulson, “What — me worry? Judge’s suppression of Gone With the Wind parody raises concerns”, Freedom Forum, May 20).

May 24 — “Family awarded $1 billion in lawsuit”. Another great day for trial lawyers under our remarkable system of unlimited punitive damages: a New Orleans jury has voted to make ExxonMobil pay $1 billion to former state district judge Joseph Grefer and his family because an Exxon contractor that leased land from the family for about thirty years left detectable amounts of radioactivity behind from its industrial activities. Exxon “said it offered to clean up the land but the Grefers declined its offers.” The company says the land could be cleaned up for $46,000 and also “claims that less than 1 percent of the land contains radiation levels above naturally occurring levels.” The jury designated $56 million of the fine for cleaning up the land; the total value of the parcel is somewhere between $500,000 (Exxon’s view) and $1.5 million (the owners). (Sandra Barbier, New Orleans Times-Picayune, May 23; Brett Martel, “Jury: ExxonMobil Should Pay $1.06B”, AP/Yahoo, May 22; “Exxon Mobil to Appeal $1 Billion Fine”, Reuters/New York Times, May 23).

May 24 — Humiliation by litigators as turning point in Clinton affair. “It strikes me as relevant that the turning point in the Lewinsky saga was the broadcasting of Clinton’s deposition, an image of an actual human being humiliated for hours on end. It was then that we realized we had gone too far — but look how far down the path we had already gone.” (Andrew Sullivan, TRB from Washington, “Himself”, The New Republic, May 7).

May 24 — Tobacco: angles on Engle. With three cigarette companies having agreed to pay $700 million just to guarantee their right to appeal a Miami jury’s confiscatory $145 billion verdict in Engle v. R.J. Reynolds, other lawyers are piling on, the latest being an alliance of hyperactive class action lawyers Cohen, Milstein, Hausfeld & Toll with O.J. Simpson defense lawyer Johnnie Cochran (“Lawsuit says tobacco industry tried to hook kids”, CNN/AP, May 23; Jay Weaver, “Tobacco firms agree to historic smoker payment”, Miami Herald, May 8; “Tobacco Companies Vow to Fight $145 Billion Verdict”, American Lawyer Media, July 17, 2000; Rick Bragg with Sarah Kershaw, “”Juror Says a ‘Sense of Mission’ Led to Huge Tobacco Damages”, New York Times, July 16, 2000 (reg); “Borrowing power to be considered in tobacco suit”, AP/Seattle Post-Intelligencer, June 1, 2000 (judge ruled that companies’ ability to borrow money could be used as a predicate for quantum of punitive damages)).

May 23 — “Insect lawyer ad creates buzz”. Torys, a large law firm based in Toronto, has caused a stir by running a recruitment ad aimed at student lawyers with pictures of weasels, rats, vultures, scorpions, cockroaches, snakes and piranhas, all under the headline “Lawyers we didn’t hire.” The ad, devised by Ogilvy and Mather, says the firm benefits from a “uniquely pleasant and collegial atmosphere” because it doesn’t hire “bullies, office politicians or toadies”, who presumably go to work for other law firms instead.

However, some defenders of invertebrates and other low-status fauna say it’s unfair to keep comparing them to members of the legal profession. Vultures, for example, “provide a really essential role in terms of removing dead animals and diseases,” says Ontario zoologist Rob Foster. “It’s slander, frankly,” he says, “adding that one exception might be the burbot, a bottom-feeding fish whose common names include ‘the lawyer.’ … ‘Whenever I see a dung beetle portrayed negatively in a commercial, I see red,’ he said yesterday, recalling that in The Far Side comic strip, cartoonist Gary Larson once drew two vermin hurling insults by calling each other ‘lawyer.'” (Tracey Tyler, Toronto Star, Apr. 19). (DURABLE LINK)

May 23 — “Working” for whom? An outfit called the Environmental Working Group has recently taken a much higher profile through its close association with “Trade Secrets”, a trial-lawyer-sourced (and, say its critics, egregiously one-sided) attack on the chemical industry that aired March 26 as a Bill Moyers special on PBS. Spotted around the same time was the following ad which ran on one of the FindLaw email services on behalf of EWG: “Thought the Cigarette Papers Were Big? 50 years of internal Chemical Industry documents including thousands of industry meeting minutes, memos, and letters. All searchable online. Everything you need to build a case at http://www.ewg.org“. Hmmm … isn’t PBS supposed to avoid letting itself be used to promote commercial endeavors, such as litigation? (more on trial lawyer sway among environmental groups)

MORE: Michael Fumento, “Bill Moyers’ Bad Chemistry”, Washington Times, April 13; PBS “TradeSecrets”; Steven Milloy, “Anti-chemical Activists And Their New Clothes”, FoxNews.com, March 30; www.AboutTradeSecrets.org (chemical industry response); ComeClean.org; Ronald Bailey, “Synthetic Chemicals and Bill Moyers”, Reason Online, March 28. The New York Times‘s Neil Genzlinger wrote a less than fully enthralled review of the Moyers special (“‘Trade Secrets’: Rendering a Guilty Verdict on Corporate America”, television review, March 26) for which indiscretion abuse was soon raining down on his head from various quarters, including the leftist Nation (“The Times v. Moyers” (editorial), April 16). (DURABLE LINK)

May 22 — From dinner party to court. “I’m never going to invite people around for dinner again,” says Annette Martin of Kingsdown, Wiltshire, England, after being served with a notice of claim for personal injury from dinner guest Margaret Stewart, who says she was hurt when she fell through a glass and steel dining chair in Miss Martin’s home. Martin says that “up to then we had been good friends,” and that Miss Stewart “looked perfectly fine when she walked out the door that evening. … I feel very strongly about the television adverts that encourage this sort of nonsense. I think the Government should intervene before we become like the Americans and sue over anything.” (Richard Savill, “Dinner party ends with a sting in the tail”, Daily Telegraph, May 19). In other U.K. news, a woman from Bolton, Lancashire, is suing stage hypnotist Philip Green, claiming that during one of his performances “she was induced to chase what she believed were fairies around the hall, drink a glass of cider believing it was water and believe she was in love with Mr. Green,” all of which left her depressed and even for a time suicidal, calling up memories of childhood abuse. (“Woman sues stage hypnotist over ‘abuse memories'”, Ananova.com, May 21) (more on hypnotist liability: March 13). UpdateMay 28: she wins case and $9,000 damages.

May 22 — Razorfish, Cisco, IPO suits. In a decision scathingly critical of the “lawyer-driven” nature of securities class action suits, New York federal judge Jed Rakoff rejected a motion by five law firms to install a group of investors as the lead plaintiff in shareholder lawsuits against Razorfish Inc., a Web design and consulting company. The investor group had been “cobbled together” for purposes of getting their lawyers into the driver’s seat, he suggested. “Here, as in many other such cases, most of the counsel who filed the original complaints attempted before filing the instant motions to reach a private agreement as to who would be put forth as lead plaintiff and lead counsel and how fees would be divided among all such counsel.” Rakoff instead installed as lead counsel Milberg Weiss and another firm, which jointly represented the largest investor claiming losses in the action. “Judge Rakoff noted drily in a footnote that numerous complaints were filed within days that essentially copied the original Milberg Weiss complaint verbatim,” and wondered whether the lawyers filing those copycat suits had taken into account the requirements of federal Rule 11. (Bruce Balestier, “Judge Rejects Lawyers’ Choice of Lead Plaintiff in Razorfish Class Actions”, New York Law Journal, May 8).

Observers are closely watching the onslaught of class action suits filed against Cisco Systems since its stock price declined. Stanford securities-law professor Joseph Grundfest, who “helped craft the 1995 reform act and has worked on both plaintiffs-side and defense cases … said he sees the Cisco case as part of a buckshot strategy by plaintiffs’ lawyers. They are suing multiple technology companies with hopes of extracting a large settlement from at least one. ‘They only need a small probability to make it worth their while,’ Grundfest said. ‘How much does it cost to write a complaint?'”. (Renee Deger, “Cisco Inferno”, The Recorder, April 27). Shareholder suits in federal court are headed toward record numbers this year in the wake of the dotcom meltdown (Daniel F. DeLong, “Lawyers Find Profit in Dot-Com Disasters”, Yahoo/ NewsFactor.com, May 14; see also Richard Williamson, “Shareholder Suits Slam High-Tech”, Interactive Week/ZDNet, Dec. 19, 2000).

May 22 — Welcome SmarterTimes readers. Ira Stoll’s daily commentary on the New York Times mentioned us on Sunday (May 20 — scroll to first “Late Again”). And Brill’s Content has now put online its “Best of the Web” roundtable in which we were recommended by federal appeals judge Alex Kozinski (May — scroll about halfway down righthand column).

May 21– Six-hour police standoff no grounds for loss of job, says employee. “A formerly suicidal insurance executive who lost his job after a six-hour standoff with police at Park Meadows mall [in Denver] is suing his former employer for discrimination under federal and state laws protecting the mentally disabled. The 43-year-old plaintiff, Richard M. Young, alleges he was wrongfully terminated from Ohio Casualty Insurance Co. after the company interpreted a suicide note he wrote to be his letter of resignation. … The civil complaint says Young was on emergency medical leave for an emotional breakdown May 29, 2000, when he drove to the shopping center’s parking garage and was spotted on mall security cameras with a revolver. … Douglas County sheriff’s deputies finally coaxed him into surrendering”. His suit seeks back pay, front pay and punitive damages. (John Accola, “Man who was suicidal sues ex-employer for discrimination”, Rocky Mountain News, May 18). (DURABLE LINK)

May 21 — “Anonymity takes a D.C. hit”. If Rep. Felix Grucci has his way, you won’t be able to duck into a library while on the road to check your Hotmail; the New York Republican has “introduced legislation requiring schools and libraries receiving federal funds to block access from their computers to anonymous Web browsing or e-mail services. … Grucci says it’s necessary to thwart the usual suspects, terrorists and child molesters.” (Declan McCullagh, Wired News, May 19). And did you know that it would be unlawful to put out this website in Italy without registering with the government and paying a fee? New regulations in that country are extending to web publishers an appalling-enough-already set of rules that require print journalists to register with the government. Says the head of the Italian journalists’ union approvingly: “Thus ends, at least in Italy, the absurd anarchy that permits anyone to publish online without standards and without restrictions, and guarantees to the consumer minimum standards of quality in all information content, for the first time including electronic media.” (Declan McCullagh’s politechbot, “Italy reportedly requires news sites to register, pay fees”, April 11; “More on Italy requiring news sites to register, pay fees”, April 12) (via Virginia Postrel’s “The Scene”, posted there May 6). (DURABLE LINK)

May 21 — “Patients’ rights” roundup. Well, duh: “Doctors supporting patients’ rights bills have suddenly become alarmed that some of the proposals could boomerang and expose them to new lawsuits.” (Robert Pear, “Doctors Fear Consequences of Proposals on Liability”, New York Times, May 6 (reg)). “Consumers do not consider the right to sue health insurers over coverage issues a top healthcare priority, according to new survey data released by the Blue Cross and Blue Shield Association (BCBSA),” which is of course an interested party in the matter; a right to sue “finished last among 21 major health issues that consumers were asked to rank.” (Karen Pallarito, “Poll: Right to sue HMOs low priority for consumers,” Reuters Health, April 26 (text) (survey data — PDF)). And if liability is to be expanded at all, Congress should consider incorporating into the scheme the “early offers” idea developed by University of Virginia law professor Jeffrey O’Connell, which is aimed at providing incentives for insurers to make, and claimants to accept, reasonable settlements at an early stage in the dispute (John Hoff, “A Better Patients’ Bill of Rights,” National Center for Policy Analysis Brief Analysis No. 355, April 19). (DURABLE LINK)

MORE: Greg Scandlen, “Legislative Malpractice: Misdiagnosing Patients’ Rights”, Cato Briefing Papers, April 7, 2000 (executive summary) (full paper — PDF); Gregg Easterbrook, “Managing Fine”, The New Republic, March 20, 2000.

December 2000 archives, part 3


December 29, 2000-January 2, 2001 — Gambler rebuffed. Reversing a lower court, the Mississippi Supreme Court has ruled that Robert Shindler has no cause of action to sue the Grand Casino Tunica for extra winnings he said he was due “for a series of mini-baccarat games he played on August 22, 1997. Shindler claims that although he wanted to bet $20,000 per hand, casino personnel would only let him bet $5,000 at a time.” (Grand Casino Tunica v. Robert Shindler, Dec. 14).

December 29, 2000-January 2, 2001 — Makes others pay, doesn’t pay himself. Civil rights activist Al Sharpton says he is planning a class-action lawsuit against the Burger King Corporation as well as “acts of civil disobedience that will be organized at targeted Burger Kings across the country.” The vow came after federal court cleared the hamburger chain of charges that it discriminated against Detroit-based black franchisee La-Van Hawkins (May 11), who had hired high-profile litigator Willie Gary to press his case. “U.S. District Court Judge Marianne Battani in Ann Arbor, Mich., ruled that Hawkins and Burger King signed a ‘clear and unambiguous’ agreement in July 1999 barring Hawkins from suing the company for any problems that arose before then. Battani also wrote that Hawkins failed to state a claim for relief. ” (“Sharpton Plans Lawsuit Against Burger King”, FoxNews.com, Dec. 18).

However, the wherewithal for Sharpton’s hyperactive litigation posture is somewhat mysterious since he claims not to have the money on hand to pay the $65,000 a jury says he owes former prosecutor Steven Pagones for defaming him during the Tawana Brawley affair 13 years ago. During a seven-hour deposition in the ongoing Pagones case, it recently emerged that Sharpton, a leading New York power broker whose publicity machine gets him into the papers approximately daily, and whose daughters attend an expensive private school, “says he owns no suits, but has ‘access’ to a dozen or so. He says he owns no television set because the one he watches in his home was purchased by a company he runs. He says he has no checking accounts, no savings accounts, no credit cards, no debit cards … The only thing he admits to owning is a $300 wristwatch and a 20-year-old wedding ring.” (“Sharpton says he has no assets to pay slander victim”, AP/CNN, Dec. 7; Alan Feuer, “Asking How Sharpton Pays for Those Suits”, New York Times, Dec. 21; “It Depends on What You Mean by ‘Own'” (sidebar), Dec. 21). (Update June 22-24, 2001: he finally pays Pagones).

December 29, 2000-January 2, 2001 — Seats in all parts. “Tiered” stadium-style seating has been a boon to countless moviegoers who no longer fear having their view blocked by a tall person in the row in front of them. But wheelchair activists are targeting such arrangements as a violation of their right to sit in all parts of a theater, and the U.S. Justice Department is backing their complaints. “The ADA has proved a powerful tool on a similar issue — handicapped seating in sports stadiums. In 1996, a U.S. District Court judge in Washington forced builders of MCI Center to halt work in mid-construction to add spaces so that wheelchair users could see beyond standing spectators and to adequately disperse wheelchair spaces throughout the arena.” (Matthew Mosk, Ian Shapira, “Buying a Ticket to Court”, Washington Post, Dec. 8; Mark Pratt, “Theaters Sued Over Disabled Seating”, AP/FindLaw, Dec. 18). And: “Country music star Garth Brooks is being sued for allegedly limiting wheelchair seating at a concert so ‘pretty women’ could sit in the first two rows. Brooks’ attorney denied the allegation, saying people in the front rows are generally Brooks’ friends. A judge ruled Friday that the complaint can proceed to trial, but said Brooks’ liability is limited because he had no control over concert operations at Seattle’s Key Arena.” (“Brooks accused of discrimination”, AP/Washington Post, Dec. 17).

December 29, 2000-January 2, 2001 — Enviro litigator: debate belongs in Congress, not courts. We promise we didn’t make up the following quote, though we understand why it might astound readers familiar with the environmental movement’s record over the past three decades of heading for court in quest of victories it couldn’t win in Congress: “Howard Fox, a lawyer with the Earthjustice Legal Defense Fund [commenting on a pending high court case which could invoke the “nondelegation” doctrine to strike down EPA-set air standards], said that industry should take its battles over national environmental policy to Congress rather than pressing the Supreme Court to overturn half a century of legal precedents that allowed Congress to delegate authority to the regulatory agencies. ‘We think EPA’s policy on this issue is a good policy,’ said Fox, who is representing the American Lung Association in the case. ‘But if someone wants to have a debate on public policy, it should be in the Congress, not the courts.'” (Margaret Kriz, “Trying to Roll Back the Regulators”, National Journal, Nov. 4, not online). See also Gregg Easterbrook, “Green values”, The New Republic, Nov. 13).

December 26-28 — That’ll teach ’em. In the largest personal-injury verdict ever handed down against the city of Chicago, a jury has ordered the city to pay $50 million to the parents of 19-year-old Douglas Gant, who died of an asthma attack. The ambulance arrived eight and a half minutes after the mother’s 911 call, but lawyers argued that it should have come sooner and that in the mean time operators should have given the family instructions on resuscitation, all of which “constituted ‘willful and wanton misconduct,’ the standard for erasing municipal immunity.” Just the sort of development sure to attract talent into the emergency services, at least if you believe the law schools’ invisible-fist theory. (Margaret Cronin Fisk, “911 Incident Brings $50 Million Award”, National Law Journal, Dec. 13)(& letter to the editor from lawyer for Gant, May 7, 2004).

December 26-28 — Appearance-blind hiring? Green-haired Santas, take hope! A popular marketing strategy among hotels, restaurants and other hospitality businesses is to differentiate themselves by style, with some going for a hip look, others dignified, others conveying a mood of family fun, and so forth. “But when hoteliers try to control the look and feel of their personnel, they can run into big legal trouble.” They may be violating employment law if they want to hire only “lithe” or “athletic-looking” personnel, for example. However, Colonial Williamsburg, the historical re-creation in Virginia, did manage to escape being sued after it asked an employee with a wild dye job to redo the look of her hair to something more “natural-looking”. (Virginia Postrel, “When the ‘Cool’ Look Is Illegal”, Forbes, Nov. 27).

December 26-28 — Updates. Further developments in stories already covered in this space:

* The tactic that occurred to various businesses of demanding that their insurance companies pay the cost of their Y2K remediation efforts, under “sue and labor” clauses originally arising from maritime emergencies (Sept. 16, 1999), has met with a setback in the first court to rule on the issue. Justice Charles E. Ramos of State Supreme Court in Manhattan ruled that the Xerox Corp. should not have waited for three years, during which it spent $138 million on the Y2K problem, before notifying its insurer that it was hoping to pass the costs along. (Barnaby J. Feder, “Court Rules on Year 2000 Claim”, New York Times, Dec. 22 (reg)).

* Cameras in the hospital: a New Jersey appeals court has set aside Cooper Medical Center’s rule against legal photography (see Oct. 18) so as to allow a lawyer into its trauma unit to take pictures of a client (Randall J. Peach, “Court Overrides Hospital’s Ban on Photographs in Intensive Care Unit”, New Jersey Law Journal/Law.com, Dec. 4).

* In the latest sign that “baby Castano” (statewide class action) tobacco cases are not faring well, a New York court has rejected the idea of certifying a statewide class of ill smokers to sue tobacco companies (“NY court rejects smokers’ class-action certification”, Reuters/FindLaw, Nov. 30).

December 22-25 — Victory in Philadelphia. “A federal judge yesterday dismissed Philadelphia’s lawsuit against gun manufacturers, ruling that the city and several civic groups that joined the suit did not have legal standing to sue.” Even if the plaintiffs had survived the standing issue, declared federal judge Berle M. Schiller, their “novel legal theories” would have failed as a matter of law. “The city’s drive to sue gun manufacturers began three years ago, under Mayor Edward G. Rendell. However, Rendell, who has ambitions to run for governor in 2002 in a state [Pennsylvania] that is famously pro-gun rights, eventually balked at filing a suit.” His successor as mayor, John Street, did proceed to sue. Many other cities’ gun suits have also been dismissed, most recently Chicago’s. (Frederick Cusick, “Court rejects city gun lawsuit”, Philadelphia Inquirer, Dec. 21).

December 22-25 — Suits even ATLA admits are frivolous dept. An inmate at a Texas prison sued Penthouse magazine, saying its recent photo spread of presidential accuser Paula Jones was insufficiently pornographic. Federal judge Sam Sparks dismissed the suit and fined the prisoner $250 for frivolous litigation, adding to his opinion a 12-line poem which concluded: “Life has its disappointments. Some come out of the blue/ But that doesn’t mean a prisoner should sue.” (“Dissatisfied Customer”, Reuters/ABCNews.com, Dec. 20)

December 22-25 — Britain’s delicate soldiery. The chief of the British military staff, General Sir Charles Guthrie, has delivered a stinging attack on “what he called a culture of ‘risk aversion’, warning of the prospect of young officers being sued by their platoons for leading men into action which could lead to death or injury. … In a swipe at the ‘litigious nation’ Britain was becoming, Sir Charles expressed surprise that policemen involved in the Hillsborough football disaster were awarded compensation for the horrors they had to cope with. … He added: ‘But what really concerns me about the creeping advance of litigation is that it will breed a cautious group of leaders who may step back from courageous decisions for fear that they will be pursued through the courts if it all goes wrong. … There is a culture of risk aversion developing in society which is anathema to servicemen. We are not foolhardy but our profession requires a degree of decisiveness, flair and courage which sits badly with some of the more restrictive practices of modern employment legislation.'” In particular, Guthrie assailed the idea recently floated by figures within British officialdom (see Sept. 29, Oct. 16) that the military should be compelled to accept disabled recruits: “we need to guard against such ill-conceived ideas in future”. (Richard Norton Taylor, “Defence chief lays into culture of ‘risk aversion'”, The Guardian (UK), Dec. 20). (“Armed Forces ‘under threat from human rights legislation'” (text of speech), Daily Telegraph, Dec. 21; Michael Smith, “Guthrie attacked over ban on disabled”, Daily Telegraph, Dec. 21; “General alert” (leader/editorial), Dec. 21). And the U.K. defense ministry has announced that the noise of military brass bands, as well as that from gunfire during infantry training exercises, is in violation of occupational-safety regulations safeguarding workers from excessive noise. “‘One solution would be to provide ear protectors during training, but then soldiers couldn’t hear their sergeant major giving orders,'” said a spokesman. (“British Army Bands May Have to Pipe Down”, Reuters/Excite, Dec. 21).

December 22-25 — Not pro bono, not nohow. The roundtable discussion in the November Harper’s on slave reparations lawsuits (see Oct. 25, July 14) was going along quite merrily, and then, as American Lawyer tells the tale, “came a conversation-stopper, when one panelist had the nerve to suggest that the lawyers toil without pay:”

Alexander Pires, Jr.: So would you all work for free?

Dennis Sweet: What?

Richard Scruggs: Um.

Willie Gary: Clients sometimes try to negotiate me down to 10 percent on a case, and I say, “Why would you want me working unhappy for you? [If I’m unhappy,] I’ll get you 100,000 bucks. If you got me happy, I’ll get you 2 million.”

Pires: Maybe I’m wrong.

Jack Hitt (moderator): I guess that issue’s resolved. (Harper’s, November; quoted in American Lawyer, Dec. 2000)

December 22-25 — Welcome visitors. Among the many personal websites linking to Overlawyered.com: Ellen’s Place, Jocelyn Payne, Whoozyerdaddy (Oct. 10), Carl Riegel and Melissa Dallas, Paul Falstad, and Frank Cross (Siskiyou County (Calif.) Amateur Radio — Aug. 3).

December 21 — Errin’ Brockovich? “An arbitrator in Ventura County, Calif., ruling on a legal malpractice case involving a law firm made famous by the film ‘Erin Brockovich‘, found that Brockovich’s testimony in the arbitration proceeding ‘was hardly credible’,” notes the Wall Street Journal‘s Opinion Journal. Former client Bilal Baroody had sued the law firm of Masry and Vititoe after losing more than $400,000 in a real estate deal on which it had represented him. Arbitrator Jeffrey Krivis wrote that the Masry/Brockovich firm had been “preoccupied with other significant matters” during the episode, which occurred while the firm was litigating the Hinkley, Calif. toxic case portrayed in the Julia Roberts movie. “[Faulty representation] is evidenced not only by the poor result, but also by the firm’s overall lack of professionalism; by the firm’s putting its own interests above those of the client; and by the firm playing fast and loose with the rules of professional conduct,” wrote Krivis. Partner Ed Masry criticized the findings as mistaken and as reflecting the arbitrator’s excessive credence in Baroody’s witnesses; it is not known whether his professional liability insurer will appeal. Moreover, “a claim isn’t necessarily because you did something wrong,” Cathy Hastings, insurance manager for the State Bar of California, told a reporter. “It’s only because someone decided to sue you.” That last strikes us as a noteworthy concession from a bar association, and we just wish it would be forthcoming more often when the topic was something other than claims against lawyers themselves. (Brad Smith, “Law firm made famous by film ruled negligent in case”, Ventura County Star, Dec. 13).

December 21 — ADA requires renting to addiction facility. A jury has found that the port of Baltimore violated the Americans with Disabilities Act when it declined to lease berth space to a ship housing a residential treatment program for recovering drug addicts. Officials of the Maryland Port Administration had considered a working port an unsuitable location for such a facility. The jury did turn down the drug program’s request for millions of dollars in damages, however. Drug users in treatment programs are deemed disabled under the ADA and enjoy its protection. (Kate Shatzkin, “Judge orders long-term lease for ship treating drug addicts”, Baltimore Sun, Dec. 12).

December 2000 archives


December 8-10 — Vicarious criminal liability? Suburban Detroit prosecutors are pressing charges of involuntary manslaughter against 49-year-old cook Terry Walker, who hails from the palindromically named town of Capac in Michigan’s rural Thumb. It seems Walker sold a chrome-plated 9mm semiautomatic gun to a friend without having the friend provide a purchase permit for it as required by law. The friend resold the weapon and it eventually wound up in the hands of Ljeka Juncaj of Sterling Heights, a stranger to Walker, who used it to kill a police officer in Warren while in custody following a drug arrest. “Macomb County Prosecutor Carl Marlinga said he hopes Walker will become the vessel for a lesson to gun owners by telling them that if they fail to properly sell a gun and it is used in a crime, that is as bad as committing the crime.” Outraged Capac townspeople think that idea is crazy, and are taking up a collection for Walker’s defense. (Kim North Shine, “Punishment of ex-owner debated”, Detroit Free Press, Dec. 7).

December 8-10 — Florida’s legal talent, before the Chad War. Wall Street Journal‘s Collin Levey pulls together highlights from the pre-November legal careers of prominent Florida attorneys assisting Democrats in their postelectoral legal efforts. Dexter Douglass, “David Boies’s right hand”, had been among those who represented the state in the tobacco lawsuit; Henry Handler, who “brought suit against the butterfly ballot”, also had filed a class-action lawsuit against the Florida Marlins “on behalf of season-ticket holders who claimed the team injured them by ‘losing too much'”; Gregory Barnhart, who represented the Democratic National Committee in recount litigation, is past president of the Florida Trial Lawyers Association; and Harry Jacobs, who “launched the lawsuit to throw out 10,000 absentee ballots in Seminole County”, had fought a “high-profile war against Florida rules preventing lawyers from advertising on television (a k a electronic ambulance chasing).” (“Gore’s Bombastic Barristers”, Opinion Journal, Dec. 7).

December 8-10 — Sylph esteem. Krissy Keefer has filed the first case under San Francisco’s new law banning discrimination on the basis of height and weight, saying the prestigious San Francisco Ballet School rejected her 8-year-old daughter Fredrika as an applicant because it considered the girl’s size and shape inappropriate for a ballerina. The school says its purpose is to train professional dancers, not to provide recreation, and says it accepted only 29 percent of the 1,400 student applications it received last year (Edward Epstein, “Girl Fights For a Chance To Dance”, San Francisco Chronicle, Dec. 7).

December 8-10 — “Armstrong World Files for Chapter 11 Amid Battle With Asbestos Lawsuits”. The building and construction materials concern “tried a number of approaches to manage its asbestos liability, including negotiating broad-based solutions and supporting efforts to find a legislative resolution. But the number of cases filed and the cost to settle cases have continued to increase.” Lenders pulled the plug after the bankruptcy of Owens Corning earlier this fall made clear that even large companies that operate with success in unrelated businesses can face financial ruin if they sold asbestos-containing products decades ago (see Nov. 27, Oct. 6; DowJones/ CFO, Dec. 6; AP/MSNBC, Dec. 6; company site and bankruptcy news site).

December 8-10 — Welcome WorldNetDaily readers. We linked to and briefly excerpted Jon Splatz’s “LawyerClysm” article on Nov. 22, and the full version appears here. (Ralph R. Reiland, “Lawyered to death”, WorldNetDaily, Dec. 9). We also got a mention from Doug Camilli in his Montreal Gazette column on Thursday (Dec. 7) and were featured on Yahoo “Cool Links” as one of Leya’s “Surfer’s Picks” (now rotated off).

December 7 — Promising areas for suits. Among the National Law Journal‘s annual roundup of hot new causes of action that lawyers are suing on: cases charging employers with breaking promises (which may be only “implied” promises) made in job interviews; injuries over foul balls and other hazards in sports stadiums, long barred by the (fast-shrinking) old doctrine of assumption of risk; suits against relatives for failing to prevent gun-related injuries; suits over workplace injury against consultants (HR, security) and other third parties who, unlike the direct employer, may not be able to invoke the litigation shield of workers’ comp laws; laser eye surgery complications; negligent failure to provide defibrillation equipment in public places; “[l]awsuits against owners, leasers and drivers of trucks over accidents caused by trucker fatigue”; suits against sports doctors; and claims against trade associations, such as the one that recently obtained an $11 million verdict against the National Spa and Pool Institute on an allegation that its voluntary standards for diving boards should have been more stringent (Margaret Cronin Fisk, “New Century, New Causes”, National Law Journal, Nov. 21).

December 7 — “Woman drops suit alleging she caught herpes from mannequin”. It now develops that Brenda Nelson (see Oct. 11) of Hammond, Ind. has consulted a second doctor and been told she does not have herpes after all, and she has accordingly dropped her suit against the American Red Cross alleging that she contracted the malady by pressing her lips to those of a first-aid mannequin, says her attorney, Jerry Jarrett. The executive director of the local Red Cross said he doubted the disease could have been transmitted in the claimed manner anyway: “‘Everyone here gets a separate mannequin. Nobody gets behind someone else in line. Staff and volunteers wash the mannequins down with warm, soapy water with a little bit of bleach in it after each class,” said the director, whose name is Wayne Wigglesworth. (AP/FindLaw, Dec. 5).

December 7 — No more “naughty”. Organizations that train and represent British nursery staff have put out the word that misbehaving tots are not to be called “naughty”, “bad boy”, “silly” or “stupid”, such terms amounting to stigma-laden “labeling”. Some nursery staff have also asked parents to avoid using the terms in correcting their own children. Others call it “political correctness gone mad”. (Martin Bentham, “‘Naughty’ is banned from the nursery”, Sunday Telegraph (London), Dec. 3).

December 7 — Trial lawyers vs. hog farms. Various lawyers active in tobacco and other mass litigation are filing nationally coordinated lawsuits against hog farms in seven states over their purported porcine pollution atrocities. An environmentalist group led by Robert Kennedy Jr., Water Keeper Alliance, will provide the media-friendly face for the effort. Fifteen law firms are kicking in $50,000 apiece to get the assault underway. (Philip Brasher, “Environmentalists Target Hog Farms”, AP/Los Angeles Times, Dec. 6). For more on hog farm litigation, see Sept. 12, 2000 and Oct. 4, 1999. And the New York Times reports today that the hog farm effort is expected to serve as the pilot case in a new alliance between environmental groups and leading trial lawyers, which will involve the filing of mass tort suits in an effort to wrest policymaking away from the Environmental Protection Agency and Congress, i.e., the units of government that have some occasion to consult the views of actual voters (Douglas Jehl, “Fearing a Bush Presidency, Groups Plan Pollution Suits”, New York Times (reg), Dec. 7). “In one court filing, the plaintiffs said that the cleanup [of North Carolina hog farms] would require restoration of 3.7 million acres of wetlands at a cost of no less than $40,000 an acre — or roughly $148 billion for these damages alone.” The major defendant in the case, Smithfield Foods, has a total market capitalization of almost exactly one-one-hundredth that sum, at $1.48 billion (Motley Fool profile, SFD). Update May 7, 2001: judge throws out first two suits; Apr. 15, 2002: RFK Jr. embarrasses himself in Iowa; Jul. 3-9, 2002: federal judge throws out suit and imposes sanctions on plaintiffs.

December 6 — You deserve a beak today. Okay, so Katherine Ortega of Newport News, Va. says she found a crispy chicken head in her order of McDonald’s fried chicken wings, and by now pictures of the handsomely breaded ornithological exhibit have been beamed round the world. But what are the damages? (Especially since Ortega didn’t eat the offending morsel, and people in other countries do eat chicken’s heads.) A local plaintiff’s injury lawyer, Stephen H. Pitler, told the Newport News paper: “It looks to me that there’s a legal wrong … people might be psychologically scarred for a very long time”. On the other hand, a liability defense lawyer said that it really wasn’t much of a case: “no more than a couple thousand dollars”, which by the standards of the U.S. legal system, you will understand, really counts as nothing at all. (Peter Dujardin, “Chicken-head incident has ruffled feathers”, Newport News (Va.) Daily Press, Nov. 30; David Koeppel, “You deserve a beak today”, FoxNews.com, Dec. 1). The Newport News paper added: “Some wondered how urbanized Americans have become so far removed from the process of killing what they eat that the mere sight of a natural piece of an animal – one that is consumed every day elsewhere in the world — could cause such emotional scarring.” Right on schedule, local TV station WVEC reports that the Ortegas have now hired an attorney; they’re refusing McDonald’s request to examine the object in question; and they “said their children now refuse to eat chicken and that their youngest child has had a nightmare about the fried chicken’s head.” (“Fried chicken’s head flies the coop”, WVEC-TV (Hampton Roads), Dec. 5; “Inspectors investigate fried chicken’s head”, Dec. 5).

December 6 — Bear market. New York Observer tells how Bear Stearns lost a nine-figure jury verdict to a wealthy investor who’d suffered major losses in his account, in a case that has other brokerages more than a little nervous (see June 9-11) (Landon Thomas Jr., “Meet the Great de Kwiatkowski, the Man Who Was Awarded $164 Million From Bear Stearns”, New York Observer, Nov. 13).

December 6 — Safer but less free. Three years ago Gail Atwater of Lago Vista, Tex. was arrested, handcuffed in front of her children and hauled off to jail for … non-seat-belt use. Now her case has reached the U.S. Supreme Court. (Amanda Onion, “Soccer Mom at Highest Court”, ABCNews.com, Dec. 1).

December 5 — California’s lucrative smog refunds. “Five law firms, including one that donated nearly a quarter-million dollars to the governor, will split $88.5 million in state taxpayer money for a lawsuit returning smog fees to residents who registered out-of-state vehicles in the 1990s.

“An arbitration panel in Sacramento made the award, among the largest attorneys’ fees ever paid by the state.

“‘I’m going to be exploring every option I have to freeze this payment,’ state Controller Kathleen Connell said Thursday. ‘No one can recall any settlement that even comes close. I’m deeply distressed.’…

“The money will come from $665 million allocated by Gov. Gray Davis and the Legislature for refunds to people who paid the $300 fee. …One of the law firms that will claim a share of the $88.5 million is Milberg, Weiss, Bershad, Specthrie & Lerach. Bill Lerach and his firm, with offices in New York and San Diego, have been among Davis’ major donors, giving him $221,000 during his 1998 election campaign, and $20,000 this year.” (“Five Firms to Split $88.5 Million for Smog Lawsuit”, AP/DowJones.com, Dec. 4; Google search on Lerach + smog fee). (Update June 22-24, 2001: judge strikes down fee; Aug. 21, 2004: second arbitration panel awards $23.7 million).

December 5 — Do as we say, cont’d: arbitration clauses. “Lawyers appear to be quick to sue almost anyone except other lawyers, a lawyers’ publication said.

Lawyers Weekly USA reported Thursday that a growing number of lawyers are putting fine print in fee agreements shielding them from being sued by a client if they botch a case.

“The Boston-based national newspaper for small law firms said lawyers instead prefer that such disputes go to private arbitration because arbitration is faster and cheaper, decisions are often made by other lawyers rather than juries, and there’s no public record.” (UPI/Virtual New York, Nov. 30).

December 5 — Might fit in at Business Week. “[Cartoonist Ted] Rall does freelance work as well, which includes a monthly cartoon for Fortune magazine, called ‘Business as Usual.’ ‘Actually, it’s one of my favorite gigs because it’s really anti-corporate, anti-business… I basically trash capitalism in Fortune…. I have no business being in Fortune, you know, it’s ridiculous. I’m a Marxist, basically.”” (Morika Tsujimura, “Cartoonist Rall Comes Out of Left Field”, Columbia Daily Spectator (Columbia University), Dec. 4) (via Romenesko/Poynter Media News).

December 4 — Burying old hatchets. The decay of the principle of statutes of limitation underlies a host of troublesome legal actions in areas ranging from slavery and WWII reparations to recovered-memory child abuse charges to Indian land claims, argues our editor in his latest Reason column (Walter Olson, “Stale Claims”, November; Paul Shepard, “Lawyers Plan Slave Reparations Suit”, AP/Excite, Nov. 4). Not everyone who has suffered historical dispossession is in a position to profit from the law’s willingness to reopen old grievances: “Germany’s highest court ruled on Wednesday that east Germans stripped of property during 60 years of dictatorship under first Nazism and then communism were not entitled to further compensation.” (Reuters/FindLaw, “Court Rejects East German Land Compensation”, Nov. 22).

December 4 — Endangered list. “The Fish and Wildlife Service says it can’t add more wildlife to the endangered species list this year because it has to spend so much time and money defending lawsuits from environmentalists. … The service is swamped by lawsuits from environmental groups demanding ‘critical habitat’ designation for some of the 1,225 species in the U.S. already listed as threatened or endangered. A critical habitat ruling describes the area where a species either lives or could live.” (“Agency: Lawsuits Stymie Conservation”, AP/FindLaw, Nov. 21).

December 4 — Exotic dancers in court. In Scranton, Pa., a jury has “ordered a nightclub to pay $363,153 to a stripper who was badly burned while performing her fire-breathing routine. … [In 1994 Patricia] Ryan accidentally dribbled a mixture of 151-proof rum and salt onto her chest and suffered second-degree burns. She alleged that the [Cabaret Nightclub’s] employees did not provide adequate safety equipment or come to her aid quickly enough.” Ryan is now 36 and is enrolled at Harvard University, according to the story. (“Burned Stripper Wins $363,153 Award “, AP/Newsday, Nov. 16). And in Cleveland, a lawyer for Jodi Ketterman has objected to a judge’s plan to order an electronic monitoring bracelet attached to her ankle in lieu of bond in a pending criminal case, saying the bulky device would interfere with her work as an exotic dancer (Karl Turner, “Exotic dancer’s lawyer says bracelet too much to wear”, Cleveland Plain Dealer, Sept. 28). More exotic dancer litigation: Aug. 14, July 26, May 23, January 28.

December 1-3 — Hauling commentators to court. Both left and right these days seem increasingly inclined to drag pundits of the opposite camp into litigation. White House aide Sidney Blumenthal, pursuing his defamation suit against Matt Drudge, is demanding that numerous conservative commentators submit to interrogation under oath about the case; the list is said to include John Fund, Arianna Huffington, Ann Coulter, David Horowitz and Tucker Carlson (David Carr, “Blumenthal-Drudge Legal Grudge Match Drags in a Who’s Who of Right-Wing Commentators”, Inside.com, Nov. 29; Michael Ledeen, “An Open Letter to the Blumenthal 25”, National Review Online, Nov. 21). Meanwhile, the litigious conservative group Judicial Watch has announced that it is going to “monitor” hostile columnists Joe Conason and Gene Lyons “among others, to make sure they do not violate the rights of American citizens,” which might easily be mistaken for a not-very-veiled intent to seek grounds to sue them (Greg Lindsay, “Judicial Watch, Clinton Administration Scourge, Targets Salon Writers Conason and Lyons”, Inside.com, Nov. 21). And the World Wrestling Federation, under fire from the social-conservative Parents Television Council, has sued PTC alleging “a multi-faceted pattern of tortious and fraudulent activities” based on its efforts to get corporate advertisers to drop their support of WWF broadcasts (“Grudge Match”, Opinion Journal (Wall Street Journal), Nov. 26).

December 1-3 — Batch of letters. The latest additions to our letters page have to do with why the EEOC’s chairman asked to stop the tape during a John Stossel interview; the Florida election debacle; and the Derrick Thomas crash.

December 1-3 — Burned by a hired witness. Lawyers around the country hired Gary S. Stocco of the National Burn Victim Foundation to testify as a courtroom expert on burn injuries, for both prosecution and criminal defense as well as in civil cases. But his resume was “filled with embellishments and false qualifications”, and listed two degrees from an outfit that “requires no course work and mails out degrees for cash”. Now he faces up to 20 years in prison after being convicted in Prince William County, Va., south of Washington, of perjury and obtaining money under false pretenses. One DA called Stocco a hired gun, while another said he “sets out to tip the scales of justice toward whoever is paying him.” Sentencing is scheduled for January.

“According to transcripts of testimony in several jurisdictions, Stocco said he had investigated hundreds of child-abuse cases as a state police officer in New Jersey and had attended surgical procedures for burn victims. But Gary Gardiner, a Prince William detective, said yesterday that Stocco had instead patrolled parking lots and hadn’t been involved in any criminal investigations or surgeries.

“Each time Stocco was allowed by a judge to testify as an expert witness, it boosted his qualifications. It’s a cycle that worries prosecutors.” (Josh White, “Roving Burn ‘Expert’ Was False Witness”, Washington Post, Nov. 3. See also New Jersey legislative commission (scroll halfway down), June 17, 1998; Georgia Firefighters Burn Foundation bulletin board; USA Today).


December 20 — Property taxes triple after wrongful-termination suit. “The Delaware County [Oklahoma] Excise Board voted Monday to impose a tax levy that will triple property taxes for Kenwood’s 128 residents to pay off a court judgment against the school system.

“Board members voted to set the levy after Kenwood school board members agreed Thursday to use $75,000 in federal Impact Aid funds to pay Garland Lane, the former school superintendent, who won a $305,600 judgment against the district in 1998 for wrongful termination.

“The school district still owes Lane $179,000. The federal trial judge ordered that Lane and his Tulsa attorney would be allowed to collect an additional 10 percent interest on the outstanding debt until it was paid.

“A Kenwood taxpayer who normally pays $224 in taxes for the year will now have to pay $763, under the levy approved Monday.” (Jann Clark, “Property tax triples in Kenwood”, Tulsa World, Dec. 12).

December 20 — Obese fliers. A judge has ruled that Southwest Airlines did not unlawfully discriminate against Cynthia Luther, whose weight exceeds 300 pounds, when it required her to buy a second seat on a flight from Reno to Burbank (“Large Passenger Has Suit Dismissed”, Yahoo/AP, Dec. 14) (via Drudge). Days earlier, a confidential report from an official agency in Canada recommended that airlines be forbidden to charge highly obese passengers for a second seat, on the grounds that their condition should count as a disability entitled to accommodation. The opinion from the Canadian Transportation Agency promptly came under fire from both directions, with the Air Transport Association of Canada charging that such a rule would be unacceptably expensive, and Helena Spring, founder of the Canadian Association for Fat Acceptance, saying that obesity should be viewed as a healthy condition rather than a disability (Glen McGregor, “Treat the obese as disabled, airlines told”, Ottawa Citizen, Dec. 10). Update Oct. 25-27, 2002: complaint by obese Canadian passenger fails.

December 20 — New batch of letters. Our letters page catches up on more of its backlog with letters from readers on the Florida recount, Microsoft’s decision to settle its “permatemps” case, and a view from British gangland on how lawyers ought to be paid.

December 20 — Jury orders Exxon to pay Alabama $3.5 billion. No, Alabama hasn’t lived down the reputation for jackpot justice it earned in cases like BMW and Whirlpool: a jury yesterday deliberated just two hours before tagging the oil company with the mega-verdict in a dispute over natural gas royalties owed the state. Consultants for the state had argued that it was due $87 million, Exxon said the figure was much lower or zero, but private attorney Bobo Cunningham of Mobile — whom the state had hired on contingency, promising him 14 percent of any winnings — convinced the jurors that $3 billion would be a much more appropriate sum (Phillip Rawls, “Jury orders Exxon to pay $3.5 billion to state in offshore gas case”, AP/Birmingham News, Dec. 19). Updates Dec. 1, 2003: first verdict thrown out, retrial yields $11.8 billion punitive damage award; Apr. 18, 2004 judge cuts that verdict to $3.6 billion.

December 18-19 — “‘Belligerent’ Worker Is Covered by ADA, Says Federal Court”. “A worker who suffers from major depression that makes her belligerent and hypersensitive to criticism has a right under the Americans with Disabilities Act to a reasonable accommodation from her supervisors, a federal judge has ruled.” After she was fired from her job as a manager with the Unisys Corp., Tina Bennett sued arguing that she had been suffering from major depression which manifested itself in interpersonal difficulties. “U.S. District Judge Franklin S. Van Antwerpen found that when a worker’s depression affects her ability to think and concentrate, she has the right under the ADA to get more feedback and guidance if it would help her perform her job. … Bennett met the test [for impairment of ‘major life activities’], Van Antwerpen said, since the evidence showed she was ‘belligerent and displayed an unprofessional attitude,’ that she had ‘difficulty controlling her emotions’ and that she was ‘incredibly sensitive to criticism.’ Bennett’s supervisor testified that Bennett’s peers felt that they could not approach her and have a meaningful conversation with her, Van Antwerpen noted, and her poor interpersonal skills were listed as a reason she was fired.” Given her “evidence linking her behavior to symptoms of her mental disability,” the judge ruled, a jury must be allowed to consider her claim for damages under the ADA. (Shannon P. Duffy, Legal Intelligencer (Philadelphia), Dec. 13).

December 18-19 — Behind the subway ads. “[T]here isn’t a subway-riding adult in New York who hasn’t seen an ad for 1-800-DIVORCE, with the O formed by a diamond ring and a woman’s hand to the side making a tossing motion.” The law firm that picks up the phone when you call, Wilens & Baker, believes in the economies of scale obtainable from a volume business. It’s also unusual among advertisers in its emphasis on such lines as immigration and bankruptcy law: “There are a thousand lawyers advertising now, and 980 are personal injury lawyers,” says Michael Wilens. (Laura Mansnerus, “From a Captive Audience, Clients”, New York Times, Nov. 15) (reg).

December 18-19 — How to litigate an American quilt. For all their cozy and nonadversarial image, quilts these days “are hot items in copyright litigation” as designers head to court to accuse each other of swiping patterns. In one pending action, Paul Levenson, a New York attorney who makes a specialty in quilt law, is representing Long Island designer Judy Boisson in a suit against the Pottery Barn chain “over an allegedly infringing quilt that, like one of Ms. Boisson’s, contains eight-pointed pastel ‘Missouri Star’ blocks on a white background. One of the burdens that Mr. Levenson has to overcome is the fact that many quilt blocks and borders have been in the public domain for more than 100 years, and that the communal spirit that led pioneer women to make quilts is the polar opposite of the mindset of intellectual property law. … Home quilters are abuzz about Ms. Boisson’s copyright claims, but Mr. Levenson says her targets are commercial entities, not grandmothers making quilts for their own families.” (Victoria Slind-Flor, “Quilts: Traditional and ‘mine'”, National Law Journal, Nov. 13).

December 18-19 — Smoker’s suit nixed in Norway. “A Norwegian court ruled [last month] the tobacco industry could not be held responsible for a smoker’s terminal cancer in the country’s first tobacco compensation lawsuit. The Orkdal District Court said the smoker, Robert Lund, continued to smoke even after the dangers of smoking ‘became broadly known and accepted’ and said tobacco’s addictiveness did not free him from responsibility for continuing to smoke.” (Doug Mellgren, “Norway puts tobacco industry on trial”, AP/Nando Times, Nov. 10).

December 18-19 — Welcome Wall Street Journal readers. The Weekend Journal‘s “Taste” editorial commentary briefly mentioned our item on female Santa litigation (see Dec. 13-14). And today’s (Monday’s) Christian Science Monitor quotes our editor on the subject of workplace litigation over accent discrimination (Kelly Hearn, “What legal experts say”, Dec. 18, sidebar to main story, “Pegged by an accent“).

December 15-17 — Farm bias settlements: line forms on the left. The U.S. Department of Agriculture recently agreed to pay more than $2 billion to settle suits claiming it had discriminated against black farmers; a suit by Indian farmers is proceeding as well. And now lawyers have filed suit seeking $3 billion in damages on behalf of female and elderly farmers allegedly treated unfairly in USDA programs. “The farmers are represented by Washington, D.C., attorney Phillip Fraas, who helped win the lawsuit brought by black farmers.” (“Women, Elderly Farmers Sue USDA”, Omaha World Herald, Dec. 11).

December 15-17 — U.K.: skipping, “conkers” taboo in schoolyards. Skipping and other pastimes are being banned in British schoolyards as potentially hazardous or antisocial, as is the age-old game of “conkers”, played by throwing chestnuts at classmates. Teachers “are nervous about legal action from parents if the children are injured, according to a survey by Keele University. … [A] poll found last month that 57 per cent of parents would ask for compensation if their child was injured at school. … Sarah Thomson, the survey’s author, said that one headmaster said he would prefer to ‘ban all playtimes, as they are a nightmare'” The survey of Midlands schools “concluded that playgrounds were now often ‘barren, sterile and unimaginative’ because of over-cautious staff.” (Glen Owen, “Playtime conkers banned as dangerous”, The Times (London), Dec. 8).

In other zero tolerance news, the Washington, D.C. subway system made news last month after its police arrested 12-year-old Ansche Hedgepeth for eating french fries in one of its stations (“Girl Arrested for Eating Fries in Subway”, AP/APBNews, Nov. 16; Petula Dvorak, “Metro Snack Patrol Puts Girl in Cuffs”, Washington Post, Nov. 16). See also Adrienne Mand, “Schools’ Zero-Tolerance Programs Both Praised and Attacked”, FoxNews.com, Oct. 11; “Zero tolerance turns silly” (editorial), Detroit News, Oct. 7.

December 15-17 — O’Quinn a top Gore recount angel. Tied for second among biggest donors to the Gore recount campaign was Houston trial lawyer John O’Quinn, a frequent subject of commentaries in this space (Aug. 4, 1999, etc.). (“Jane Fonda, others pony up for Gore”, AP/MSNBC, Dec. 8). Aside from his role representing the state of Texas in the tobacco litigation (May 22, 2000), O’Quinn is probably best known for having reaped a huge fortune suing on the theory that silicone breast implants cause autoimmune and related illnesses, a theory that O’Quinn and his p.r. firm, Fenton Communications, still strive tenaciously to keep alive — a far more dogged refusal-to-concede than in the Gore case, which lasted mere weeks. See also Doug Bandow, “Ending silicone breast implant saga”, TownHall.com, Dec. 13.

December 13-14 — Supreme Court: forget that recount. Looks like it’s really, really over this time, but every time we allow ourselves to think so, a hand resembling David Boies’s pops out of the ground and starts pulling us down as in the last scene of Carrie. (Charles Babington, “High Court Overrules Gore Recount Plea”, washingtonpost.com, Dec. 12; Supreme Court opinions (PDF)). The courts are going to come out of this one looking more partisan, partial and willful, writes Stuart Taylor, Jr., who predicted the Supreme Court’s 5-4 split; but the real blame should be laid on the Florida Supreme Court for having “betrayed its trust and done grave damage to the rule of law”. (“The Dangers of Judicial Hubris”, Slate, Dec. 11). “It should now be obvious to most people that the Rule of Trial Lawyers isn’t a good substitute for the Rule of Law. … it’s worth noting that three of the four justices who voted for Al Gore’s ‘adventures in recounting’ on Friday had been personal-injury trial lawyers.” (John H. Fund, “Saved from rule of trial lawyers”, MS/NBC, Dec. 9). And Christopher Caldwell, in a column making too many interesting points to recount, asks the question: why did the candidates file most of the Florida lawsuits against their own side, with Gore suing Democratic-run counties and Bush suing those run by the GOP, the opposite of what you might expect if the point of election challenges is to expose and correct partisan irregularities? (“Bench Press”, New York Press, Dec. 12).

December 13-14 — Latest female Santa case. Donna Underwood of Mount Hope, W.V. has sued a company that had hired her to play Santa Claus for children at a mall in Beckley. “She said the company fired her after one of the mall’s managers complained about having a female Santa.” (“Woman Fights for Right to Be Mr. Claus”, FoxNews.com, Dec. 11). In October (see Oct. 12) the Kentucky Commission on Human Rights said it was okay for Wal-Mart not to employ a female Santa.

December 13-14 — “Economy-class syndrome” class action. A Melbourne, Australia law firm is filing a proposed class action on behalf of victims of “economy-class syndrome” against airlines and travel agents. The suit will claim that the complainants were not warned that sitting for prolonged periods in cramped conditions might lead to blood clots in the legs and elsewhere, and were not advised to get up from time to time to walk about the cabin. (Alison Crosweller, “‘Economy-class syndrome’ victims to sue”, The Australian, Dec. 11).

December 13-14 — Internet service disclaimers. Anxious to limit their liability, Internet service providers insert into their service agreements a lot of “defensive legalistic blather designed to keep the company out of court”, which taken literally would place many of their ordinary users in violation for doing things like maintaining multiple chats at once. They also reserve the right to change the rules: “‘They could suddenly demand you wear a bra and panties and dance in the street, and you are contractually bound to it, the way this is written,’ says Andrew Weill, a partner at Benjamin, Weill & Mazer, an intellectual property firm in San Francisco.” In practice users treat the language as a joke (but also are slower to sue). (John Dvorak, “Nihilists at Home”, Forbes, Oct. 2).

December 13-14 — Hamilton’s example. “Few men contributed as much to the ratification of the Constitution as Alexander Hamilton, who wrote the majority of The Federalist Papers. Hamilton worked as a lawyer. Unlike the landed gentry, he had to earn a living. The individual whose economic policies ensured the young Republic’s survival did not amass a huge personal fortune. In Alexander Hamilton, American, Richard Brookhiser explains: ‘His skill and success put him in great demand . . . and if he did not become rich from his practice, it was because of the interruptions of public life and because he charged low fees.’

“Low fees? Those words seldom appear in stories about, for instance, the tobacco lawsuits. Hamilton didn’t eat in a soup kitchen or live in a shelter, but he didn’t make enough to buy the era’s equivalent of a sports team, either. And if all lawyers followed his example, then audiences would not hoot and howl during a certain intense Shakespearean scene.” (“Law school” (editorial), Richmond Times-Dispatch, Nov. 28).

December 11-12 — What was the Florida court thinking? In Slate, University of Utah law professor Mike McConnell clears up why the actions of the Florida Supreme Court in the recount case are properly reviewable by the federal courts: “Article II, Section 1 [of the Constitution] provides that electors [of a state] shall be appointed ‘in such Manner as the Legislature thereof may direct.’ Any significant deviation from state statutory law is therefore a federal issue.” McConnell explains how the Florida high court has now (again) attempted to impose a method for the counting of votes (and thus for the resultant appointment of electors) markedly at odds with the manner laid down before the election by its legislature, making it proper for the U.S. Supreme Court to intervene a second time to vacate its action. And McConnell raises the interesting question: if the Florida high court really thought a statewide hand count advisable, why didn’t it order one earlier, when it had access to the same basic information and there was much more time to conduct one? (“What was the Florida court thinking?”, Dec. 9).

More: Michael Barone on how the Florida fiasco is likely to bring judicial activism into further disrepute (“Red Queen rules”, U.S. News & World Report, Dec. 18). George Will finds lawyer David Boies getting away with some pretty fast moves before the Sunshine State jurists (“Truth Optional”, Washington Post, Dec. 10). The Chicago Tribune says the Florida court’s “reckless leaps of illogic not only have threatened the integrity of the election, but also have risked tossing the nation into real turmoil.” (“A Supreme Blow for the Rule of Law” (editorial), Dec. 10)

December 11-12 — “Stock Options: A Gold Mine For Racial-Discrimination Suits?”. Lucrative tactic for lawyers representing disgruntled minority employees of firms like Microsoft, Gateway, Sun, Cisco and AOL: claim that had it not been for racism your client would have gotten stock options. Given the way these stocks have been behaving lately, they’d better hurry up with this theory while the options are still worth something (Jordan Pine and Linda Bean, DiversityInc.com, Dec. 5 (reg after first page teaser)).

December 11-12 — New Jersey OKs retroactive tort legislation. “Filling in for Gov. Christie Whitman, the New Jersey Senate president, Donald T. DiFrancesco, [last month] signed into law a measure that eliminates a two-year statute of limitations on wrongful death lawsuits involving victims of murder or manslaughter. The law is meant to give distraught families time to deal with the trauma of losing a loved one before turning to the task of seeking compensation from the people, businesses or institutions [emphasis added] they believe are responsible for the death. Yesterday’s measure applies retroactively, and therefore allows … past victims’ families to sue, [according to a spokeswoman for Sen. DiFrancesco]. “Frank Askin, founder of the constitutional litigation clinic at Rutgers University, said that he did not see a problem with the clause being retroactive, so long as the defendants in lawsuits had been convicted, thus establishing beyond reasonable doubt that a murder or manslaughter did occur, and that the evidence was clear and convincing.” Askin’s answer seems curiously beside the point given that the most frequent financial targets of such suits are sure to be not the actual individual killers, but the “businesses or institutions” that will be accused of such sins as “negligent security” (based on, say, allegedly inadequate lighting or patrolling of parking lots). These defendants normally will not have been charged with any criminal offense at all in connection with the incidents, let alone had such guilt established beyond reasonable doubt, yet now are apparently being opened to suit retroactively, despite the expiration of the statute. Sen. DiFrancesco is expected to run for governor of New Jersey in 2001. (“New Law Ends Time Limits On Wrongful Death Lawsuits”, New York Times, Nov. 18) (more on decay of statutes of limitation).

December 11-12 — Florida lawyers’ day jobs, cont’d. The election isn’t the only reason a lot of lawyers hang out in the Sunshine State these days: “If South Florida is the Wild Wild West of the class-action world, then the region’s posse of plaintiff lawyers are the cowboys. Some of the wealthiest, most prominent power brokers in the community, these litigators have turned South Florida into a hotbed for class-action lawsuits.” (Julie Kay, “Along for the Ride”, Miami Daily Business Review, Oct. 24) (quotes our editor). St. Petersburg Times columnist Bob Trigaux found in October that the state of Florida won the not-coveted award for the year’s worst suit (“The most frivolous lawsuit award goes to …”, Oct. 4) (also quotes our editor) (and see Dec. 8-10).

December 11-12 — Trustworthy professionals. Nurses, pharmacists and veterinarians score highest in a survey of which occupations are viewed as most honest and ethical; teachers, clergy, judges and police also do well. Attorneys are “consistently rated among the top five professions for prestige, but near the bottom for ethics and honesty.” (Daniel B. Wood, “Who people trust — by profession”, Christian Science Monitor, Nov. 28).


December 29, 2000-January 2, 2001 — Gambler rebuffed. Reversing a lower court, the Mississippi Supreme Court has ruled that Robert Shindler has no cause of action to sue the Grand Casino Tunica for extra winnings he said he was due “for a series of mini-baccarat games he played on August 22, 1997. Shindler claims that although he wanted to bet $20,000 per hand, casino personnel would only let him bet $5,000 at a time.” (Grand Casino Tunica v. Robert Shindler, Dec. 14).

December 29, 2000-January 2, 2001 — Makes others pay, doesn’t pay himself. Civil rights activist Al Sharpton says he is planning a class-action lawsuit against the Burger King Corporation as well as “acts of civil disobedience that will be organized at targeted Burger Kings across the country.” The vow came after federal court cleared the hamburger chain of charges that it discriminated against Detroit-based black franchisee La-Van Hawkins (May 11), who had hired high-profile litigator Willie Gary to press his case. “U.S. District Court Judge Marianne Battani in Ann Arbor, Mich., ruled that Hawkins and Burger King signed a ‘clear and unambiguous’ agreement in July 1999 barring Hawkins from suing the company for any problems that arose before then. Battani also wrote that Hawkins failed to state a claim for relief. ” (“Sharpton Plans Lawsuit Against Burger King”, FoxNews.com, Dec. 18).

However, the wherewithal for Sharpton’s hyperactive litigation posture is somewhat mysterious since he claims not to have the money on hand to pay the $65,000 a jury says he owes former prosecutor Steven Pagones for defaming him during the Tawana Brawley affair 13 years ago. During a seven-hour deposition in the ongoing Pagones case, it recently emerged that Sharpton, a leading New York power broker whose publicity machine gets him into the papers approximately daily, and whose daughters attend an expensive private school, “says he owns no suits, but has ‘access’ to a dozen or so. He says he owns no television set because the one he watches in his home was purchased by a company he runs. He says he has no checking accounts, no savings accounts, no credit cards, no debit cards … The only thing he admits to owning is a $300 wristwatch and a 20-year-old wedding ring.” (“Sharpton says he has no assets to pay slander victim”, AP/CNN, Dec. 7; Alan Feuer, “Asking How Sharpton Pays for Those Suits”, New York Times, Dec. 21; “It Depends on What You Mean by ‘Own'” (sidebar), Dec. 21). (Update June 22-24, 2001: he finally pays Pagones).

December 29, 2000-January 2, 2001 — Seats in all parts. “Tiered” stadium-style seating has been a boon to countless moviegoers who no longer fear having their view blocked by a tall person in the row in front of them. But wheelchair activists are targeting such arrangements as a violation of their right to sit in all parts of a theater, and the U.S. Justice Department is backing their complaints. “The ADA has proved a powerful tool on a similar issue — handicapped seating in sports stadiums. In 1996, a U.S. District Court judge in Washington forced builders of MCI Center to halt work in mid-construction to add spaces so that wheelchair users could see beyond standing spectators and to adequately disperse wheelchair spaces throughout the arena.” (Matthew Mosk, Ian Shapira, “Buying a Ticket to Court”, Washington Post, Dec. 8; Mark Pratt, “Theaters Sued Over Disabled Seating”, AP/FindLaw, Dec. 18). And: “Country music star Garth Brooks is being sued for allegedly limiting wheelchair seating at a concert so ‘pretty women’ could sit in the first two rows. Brooks’ attorney denied the allegation, saying people in the front rows are generally Brooks’ friends. A judge ruled Friday that the complaint can proceed to trial, but said Brooks’ liability is limited because he had no control over concert operations at Seattle’s Key Arena.” (“Brooks accused of discrimination”, AP/Washington Post, Dec. 17).

December 29, 2000-January 2, 2001 — Enviro litigator: debate belongs in Congress, not courts. We promise we didn’t make up the following quote, though we understand why it might astound readers familiar with the environmental movement’s record over the past three decades of heading for court in quest of victories it couldn’t win in Congress: “Howard Fox, a lawyer with the Earthjustice Legal Defense Fund [commenting on a pending high court case which could invoke the “nondelegation” doctrine to strike down EPA-set air standards], said that industry should take its battles over national environmental policy to Congress rather than pressing the Supreme Court to overturn half a century of legal precedents that allowed Congress to delegate authority to the regulatory agencies. ‘We think EPA’s policy on this issue is a good policy,’ said Fox, who is representing the American Lung Association in the case. ‘But if someone wants to have a debate on public policy, it should be in the Congress, not the courts.'” (Margaret Kriz, “Trying to Roll Back the Regulators”, National Journal, Nov. 4, not online). See also Gregg Easterbrook, “Green values”, The New Republic, Nov. 13).

December 26-28 — That’ll teach ’em. In the largest personal-injury verdict ever handed down against the city of Chicago, a jury has ordered the city to pay $50 million to the parents of 19-year-old Douglas Gant, who died of an asthma attack. The ambulance arrived eight and a half minutes after the mother’s 911 call, but lawyers argued that it should have come sooner and that in the mean time operators should have given the family instructions on resuscitation, all of which “constituted ‘willful and wanton misconduct,’ the standard for erasing municipal immunity.” Just the sort of development sure to attract talent into the emergency services, at least if you believe the law schools’ invisible-fist theory. (Margaret Cronin Fisk, “911 Incident Brings $50 Million Award”, National Law Journal, Dec. 13)(& letter to the editor from lawyer for Gant, May 7, 2004).

December 26-28 — Appearance-blind hiring? Green-haired Santas, take hope! A popular marketing strategy among hotels, restaurants and other hospitality businesses is to differentiate themselves by style, with some going for a hip look, others dignified, others conveying a mood of family fun, and so forth. “But when hoteliers try to control the look and feel of their personnel, they can run into big legal trouble.” They may be violating employment law if they want to hire only “lithe” or “athletic-looking” personnel, for example. However, Colonial Williamsburg, the historical re-creation in Virginia, did manage to escape being sued after it asked an employee with a wild dye job to redo the look of her hair to something more “natural-looking”. (Virginia Postrel, “When the ‘Cool’ Look Is Illegal”, Forbes, Nov. 27).

December 26-28 — Updates. Further developments in stories already covered in this space:

* The tactic that occurred to various businesses of demanding that their insurance companies pay the cost of their Y2K remediation efforts, under “sue and labor” clauses originally arising from maritime emergencies (Sept. 16, 1999), has met with a setback in the first court to rule on the issue. Justice Charles E. Ramos of State Supreme Court in Manhattan ruled that the Xerox Corp. should not have waited for three years, during which it spent $138 million on the Y2K problem, before notifying its insurer that it was hoping to pass the costs along. (Barnaby J. Feder, “Court Rules on Year 2000 Claim”, New York Times, Dec. 22 (reg)).

* Cameras in the hospital: a New Jersey appeals court has set aside Cooper Medical Center’s rule against legal photography (see Oct. 18) so as to allow a lawyer into its trauma unit to take pictures of a client (Randall J. Peach, “Court Overrides Hospital’s Ban on Photographs in Intensive Care Unit”, New Jersey Law Journal/Law.com, Dec. 4).

* In the latest sign that “baby Castano” (statewide class action) tobacco cases are not faring well, a New York court has rejected the idea of certifying a statewide class of ill smokers to sue tobacco companies (“NY court rejects smokers’ class-action certification”, Reuters/FindLaw, Nov. 30).

December 22-25 — Victory in Philadelphia. “A federal judge yesterday dismissed Philadelphia’s lawsuit against gun manufacturers, ruling that the city and several civic groups that joined the suit did not have legal standing to sue.” Even if the plaintiffs had survived the standing issue, declared federal judge Berle M. Schiller, their “novel legal theories” would have failed as a matter of law. “The city’s drive to sue gun manufacturers began three years ago, under Mayor Edward G. Rendell. However, Rendell, who has ambitions to run for governor in 2002 in a state [Pennsylvania] that is famously pro-gun rights, eventually balked at filing a suit.” His successor as mayor, John Street, did proceed to sue. Many other cities’ gun suits have also been dismissed, most recently Chicago’s. (Frederick Cusick, “Court rejects city gun lawsuit”, Philadelphia Inquirer, Dec. 21).

December 22-25 — Suits even ATLA admits are frivolous dept. An inmate at a Texas prison sued Penthouse magazine, saying its recent photo spread of presidential accuser Paula Jones was insufficiently pornographic. Federal judge Sam Sparks dismissed the suit and fined the prisoner $250 for frivolous litigation, adding to his opinion a 12-line poem which concluded: “Life has its disappointments. Some come out of the blue/ But that doesn’t mean a prisoner should sue.” (“Dissatisfied Customer”, Reuters/ABCNews.com, Dec. 20)

December 22-25 — Britain’s delicate soldiery. The chief of the British military staff, General Sir Charles Guthrie, has delivered a stinging attack on “what he called a culture of ‘risk aversion’, warning of the prospect of young officers being sued by their platoons for leading men into action which could lead to death or injury. … In a swipe at the ‘litigious nation’ Britain was becoming, Sir Charles expressed surprise that policemen involved in the Hillsborough football disaster were awarded compensation for the horrors they had to cope with. … He added: ‘But what really concerns me about the creeping advance of litigation is that it will breed a cautious group of leaders who may step back from courageous decisions for fear that they will be pursued through the courts if it all goes wrong. … There is a culture of risk aversion developing in society which is anathema to servicemen. We are not foolhardy but our profession requires a degree of decisiveness, flair and courage which sits badly with some of the more restrictive practices of modern employment legislation.'” In particular, Guthrie assailed the idea recently floated by figures within British officialdom (see Sept. 29, Oct. 16) that the military should be compelled to accept disabled recruits: “we need to guard against such ill-conceived ideas in future”. (Richard Norton Taylor, “Defence chief lays into culture of ‘risk aversion'”, The Guardian (UK), Dec. 20). (“Armed Forces ‘under threat from human rights legislation'” (text of speech), Daily Telegraph, Dec. 21; Michael Smith, “Guthrie attacked over ban on disabled”, Daily Telegraph, Dec. 21; “General alert” (leader/editorial), Dec. 21). And the U.K. defense ministry has announced that the noise of military brass bands, as well as that from gunfire during infantry training exercises, is in violation of occupational-safety regulations safeguarding workers from excessive noise. “‘One solution would be to provide ear protectors during training, but then soldiers couldn’t hear their sergeant major giving orders,'” said a spokesman. (“British Army Bands May Have to Pipe Down”, Reuters/Excite, Dec. 21).

December 22-25 — Not pro bono, not nohow. The roundtable discussion in the November Harper’s on slave reparations lawsuits (see Oct. 25, July 14) was going along quite merrily, and then, as American Lawyer tells the tale, “came a conversation-stopper, when one panelist had the nerve to suggest that the lawyers toil without pay:”

Alexander Pires, Jr.: So would you all work for free?

Dennis Sweet: What?

Richard Scruggs: Um.

Willie Gary: Clients sometimes try to negotiate me down to 10 percent on a case, and I say, “Why would you want me working unhappy for you? [If I’m unhappy,] I’ll get you 100,000 bucks. If you got me happy, I’ll get you 2 million.”

Pires: Maybe I’m wrong.

Jack Hitt (moderator): I guess that issue’s resolved. (Harper’s, November; quoted in American Lawyer, Dec. 2000)

December 22-25 — Welcome visitors. Among the many personal websites linking to Overlawyered.com: Ellen’s Place, Jocelyn Payne, Whoozyerdaddy (Oct. 10), Carl Riegel and Melissa Dallas, Paul Falstad, and Frank Cross (Siskiyou County (Calif.) Amateur Radio — Aug. 3).

December 21 — Errin’ Brockovich? “An arbitrator in Ventura County, Calif., ruling on a legal malpractice case involving a law firm made famous by the film ‘Erin Brockovich‘, found that Brockovich’s testimony in the arbitration proceeding ‘was hardly credible’,” notes the Wall Street Journal‘s Opinion Journal. Former client Bilal Baroody had sued the law firm of Masry and Vititoe after losing more than $400,000 in a real estate deal on which it had represented him. Arbitrator Jeffrey Krivis wrote that the Masry/Brockovich firm had been “preoccupied with other significant matters” during the episode, which occurred while the firm was litigating the Hinkley, Calif. toxic case portrayed in the Julia Roberts movie. “[Faulty representation] is evidenced not only by the poor result, but also by the firm’s overall lack of professionalism; by the firm’s putting its own interests above those of the client; and by the firm playing fast and loose with the rules of professional conduct,” wrote Krivis. Partner Ed Masry criticized the findings as mistaken and as reflecting the arbitrator’s excessive credence in Baroody’s witnesses; it is not known whether his professional liability insurer will appeal. Moreover, “a claim isn’t necessarily because you did something wrong,” Cathy Hastings, insurance manager for the State Bar of California, told a reporter. “It’s only because someone decided to sue you.” That last strikes us as a noteworthy concession from a bar association, and we just wish it would be forthcoming more often when the topic was something other than claims against lawyers themselves. (Brad Smith, “Law firm made famous by film ruled negligent in case”, Ventura County Star, Dec. 13).

December 21 — ADA requires renting to addiction facility. A jury has found that the port of Baltimore violated the Americans with Disabilities Act when it declined to lease berth space to a ship housing a residential treatment program for recovering drug addicts. Officials of the Maryland Port Administration had considered a working port an unsuitable location for such a facility. The jury did turn down the drug program’s request for millions of dollars in damages, however. Drug users in treatment programs are deemed disabled under the ADA and enjoy its protection. (Kate Shatzkin, “Judge orders long-term lease for ship treating drug addicts”, Baltimore Sun, Dec. 12).