• I’m pretty certain my cat is trying to kill me. She sees me coming with a full load of laundry and immediately makes for the stairs to go lie across! I’m not sure what the benefit for her would be, other than feasting on my corpse for a few days, the food would then stop.

  • @curiositykt: You must have really annoyed your cat. Not satisfied with simply re-wiring your brain via Toxoplasmosis, she’s now trying to kill you dead.

  • I am convinced the cat and my wife are in cahoots, and will split the insurance money when I fall down the stairs and break my neck.

  • My cat just tries to smother me. She must sleep on my arm, next to my face. Must.